MY SHORTEST DATE

(July, 2024) Reddit asked, “What’s the shortest date you’ve ever been on?” Some of the responses:
– “Met a guy online. He started making fun of my voice the moment I got in the car. I told him I left my wallet inside, ran in to ‘get it,’ and texted him that he needed to leave immediately and never contact me again. Time spent: About 45 seconds.”
– “Met for a beer. She ordered 2 beers, chugged them both and then had to go.”
– “Guy I was crushing on for months invited me to house party…got there, it was an Amway meeting. I was out of there in five minutes.”
– “About 30 minutes. She showed up with a friend, and so did I. Our friends ended up marrying each other.”
– “He opened the door for me while calling me ‘Princess Tiny’ and patted me on the head. I turned around and left. 3 minutes.”
– “Five seconds into sitting down he told me it was a dare.”
– “He waited until I went to the bathroom and literally ran out of the bar without saying anything, then texted me later to tell me that I was uglier than he expected.”
– “Went to the river with someone, he emptied his pockets which consisted of his phone, wallet, and a condom. And then proceeded to show me his ‘parkour’ skills while he jumped from rock to rock.”
– “I got set up by a co-worker with her brother. Brother showed up at the door with a ball python wrapped around him. HELL NO. Door slammed.”
* PHONE TOPIC: What was your shortest date?