THE WORST EXCUSES FOR CHEATING

(October 2022) Reddit user u/Shinfekta recently asked, “What’s the worst excuse you ever heard for cheating?” Some of the responses:
– “It was my birthday, and I really wanted to.”
– “I once overheard someone on the phone say, ‘He caught me cheating, but that serves him right for spying on me.'”
– “Her excuse for cheating was, ‘I wanted to see if you loved me enough to stay after I did it.'”
– “He said, ‘I thought y’all were friends.'”
– “The lights were off. I couldn’t see.”
– “After 21 years of marriage and two children, my wife confessed to cheating, and her excuse was ‘I performed a soul retrieval on him, and discovered that he was my soulmate, for thousands of past lives and thousands of lives into the future.'”
– “You were too nice. I’m doing you a favor.”
– “He said, ‘I thought about you the whole time.'”
– “I’m an alpha, and that’s what we do.”
– “She said, ‘I actually wasn’t cheating on you. I was dating (the other guy) first, so I was actually cheating on him.'”
– “She’s your twin. Does it really count as cheating?”
* I’m going to go ahead and say that last one is the most awkward.
* Those are some of the worst excuses for excuses I’ve ever heard.
* At least nobody said, “You’re just not that good.” Ouch!
* Why ask for a reason? Is there any possible reason that would make it okay? “I must have been sleepwalking.” Sheesh!
* PHONE TOPIC: Did you ever get a ridiculous excuse from a partner for cheating?