FRIDAY, May 27 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR FRIDAY, May 27, 2022
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NOTE: MORNING SIDEKICK WILL BE OFF ON MONDAY, MAY 30 FOR THE U.S. MEMORIAL DAY HOLIDAY. WE WILL RETURN WITH PREP FOR TUESDAY, MAY 31

COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

NATIONAL CELLOPHANE TAPE DAY
The National Day Calendar website says this:
“Celebrated annually on May 27, it is National Cellophane Tape Day. It is hard to imagine where we would be without this invention. How would we wrap our Christmas and birthday gifts? This common household/office item, which is also known as invisible tape or Scotch Tape, was invented by Richard Gurley Drew (June 22, 1899 – December 14, 1980). Drew joined the 3M Company in St. Paul, Minnesota in 1920, first inventing masking tape in 1926, followed by cellophane tape in 1930.”

NATIONAL GRAPE POPSICLE DAY

SUNSCREEN PROTECTION DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“Sun Screen Day educates and brings awareness to the importance of using sunscreen to protect yourself and your children from harmful UV rays from the sun. This day is held on May 27th, just in advance of summer and vacation season. Overexposure to the sun can cause a number of health problems. It can cause skin cancer, and sunspots. It can also result in premature aging of your skin. Doctors and medical professionals advocate the use of sunscreen, to guard against health problems. They recommend an Skin Protection Factor(SPF) of 15 or more. Sunscreens should be used for all outdoor activities, including swimming. And yes, sun screens should be used on cloudy days. UV rays can penetrate through the clouds. Now get out and celebrate Sun Screen Day in the sun … with your sun screen protection!”

May is:

Chip Your Pet Month / Pet Month
Date Your Mate Month
International Civility Awareness Month
National Barbeque Month
National Bike Month
National Egg Month
National Hamburger Month
National Military Appreciation Month
National Salad Month
National Salsa Month
Older Americans Month

THE BUZZTHE DIRTIEST SOUNDING TOWNS IN EVERY STATE

A website called Estately.com has made it their mission to list every naughty-sounding town name in every state. Here is their list. (You’re going to have to do your own self-censoring):
ALABAMA: Ballplay, Boar Tush, Smut Eye
ALASKA: Clam Gulch, Kokhanok, Manley Hot Springs, Mary’s Igloo, North Pole
ARIZONA: Kaka, Parker Strip, Show Low, Three Way
ARKANSAS: Bald Knob, Biggers, Blue Ball, Corning, Greasy Corner, Pea Ridge, Romance, Toad Suck, Weiner
CALIFORNIA: Bush, Chubbuck, Clam Beach, Fort Dick, Hooker, Johnsondale, Old Fig Garden, Peters, Raisin City, Shafter, Woody
COLORADO: Atwood, Beaver Creek, Hotchkiss, Johnson Village, Lay, Loveland, Lubers, Slagger, Wetmore, Woodrow, Woody Creek
CONNECTICUT: Happyland, Moosup, Seymour
DELAWARE: Blue Ball, Cocked Hat, Hoars Addition, Midnight Thicket, Swallow Hill
FLORIDA: Bunker Donation, Chattahoochee, Fluffy Landing, Miccosukee, Needmore, Wildwood
GEORGIA: Balls Ferry, Boneville, Butts, Cumming, Faceville, Flippen, Gumlog, Hardup, Lumpkin
HAWAII: Honaunau-Napoopoo
IDAHO: Athol, Bone, Cream Can Junction, Dickshooter, Dingle, Hand Place, Headquarters, Slickpoo, Wickahoney
ILLINOIS: Bone Gap, Boody, Breeds, Bush, Chicken Bristle, Chittyville, Diswood, Dongola, Ficklin, Honey Bend, Lick Creek, Love, Shobonier
INDIANA: Beaver City, French Lick, Effingham, Floyds Knobs, Friendswood, Gnaw Bone, Spurgeon
IOWA: Balltown, Beaverdale, Cumming, Fertile, Hard Scratch, Inwood, Manly, Sac City
KANSAS: Deerhead, Dry Wood
KENTUCKY: Bald Knob, Beaver Dam, Beaverlick, Bigbone, Broad Bottom, Girdler, Knob Lick, Load, Morehead, Mud Lick, Sugar Tit
LOUISIANA: Dry Prong, Grosse Tete, Grand Cane, Hardwood
MAINE: Bangor, Owls Head, Schoodic, Shady Nook
MARYLAND: Blue Ball Village, Bushwood, Cockeysville, Crapo, Dames Quarter, Loveville
MASSACHUSETTS: Felchville, Woods Hole
MICHIGAN: Climax, Colon, Dick, Felch, Green Bush, Sac Bay
MINNESOTA: Ball Bluff, Ball Club, Balsam, Beaver, Big Woods, Bush Landing, Chokio, Clappers, Climax, Comstock, Cumming, Erhard, Goldenrod, Good Thunder, Johnson, Kiester, Moorhead, Remer, Sexton, Underwood, Whipholt
MISSISSIPPI: Biggersville, Buckatunna, Hushpuckena, Leakesville, Purvis, Splunge, Sweatman, Woodville
MISSOURI: Conception, Conception Junction, Cooter, Corning, Fidelity, Ginger Blue, Knob Noster, Licking, Loose Creek, Pilot Knob, Tightwad, Wood
MONTANA: Big Sag, Comertown
NEBRASKA: Beaver City, Colon, Comstock, Dix, Lodgepole, Purple Cane
NEVADA: Coyote Hole, Jackpot, Lovelock, Pahrump, Parker Strip, Sugar Bunker
NEW HAMPSHIRE: Effingham
NEW JERSEY: Antrim, Bay Head, Buttzville, Nutley, Ramtown, Ringwood, Spotswood, Succasunna, Tuckahoe, Wildwood
NEW MEXICO: Bluit, Faywood, Loving, Pie Town
NEW YORK: Atwood, Ausable Chasm, Baiting Hollow, Ballston, Butternuts, Climax, Conewango, Conquest, Corning, Cumminsville, Coxsackie, Feura Bush, Fort Johnson, Glen Head, Johnson, Johnson City, Kringsbush, Mannsville, Porcaville, Pound Ridge, Rathbone, Rockwood, Rodman, Sugarbush (* What the hell, New York??!)
NORTH CAROLINA: Aho, Blowing Rock, Butters, Climax, Coinjock, Engelhard, Forbush, Hobucken, Hookerton, Lizard Lick, Love Valley, Low Gap, Mann’s Harbor, Nags Head, Pee Dee, Roughhedge, Stumpy Point
NORTH DAKOTA: Cummings, Spiritwood
OHIO: Ballville, Corning, Dry Run, Knockemstiff (ghost town), Laings, Licking View, Long Bottom, Pee Pee Township, Plumwood, Seaman, Shadyside, Spunky Puddle (ghost town), Trotwood
OKLAHOMA: Beaver, Bowlegs, Bushyhead, Dripping Springs, Greasy, Hooker, Jumbo, Loving, Olustee, Pump Back
OREGON: Ballston, Beaverton, Bridal Veil, Butteville, Climax, Wankers Corner, Woodburn
PENNSYLVANIA: Big Beaver, Blue Ball, Black Lick, Coplay, Hopwood, Hop Bottom, Intercourse, Lickdale, New Beaver, Rough and Ready, Virginville, Youngwood
RHODE ISLAND: Woonsocket
SOUTH CAROLINA: Fingerville, Ninety Six, Sugar Tit, Thicketty
SOUTH DAKOTA: Beaver Crossing, Black Pipe, Bonesteel, Castlewood, Hooker, Rumpus Ridge, Swett
TENNESSEE: Ballplay, Big Barren Creek, Bumpus Mills, Finger, Flippin, Guys, Lick Skillet, Nutbush, Rockwood, Shackle Island, Sweet Lips, Wartburg
TEXAS: Bangs, Bleakwood, Camp Wood, Cumby, Cumings, Comstock, Dickens, Ding Dong, Friendswood, Glaze City, Greatwood, Jean-Loving, Kinkler, Latex, Leakey, Lovelady, Rockwood, Snook, Spearman, Tool
UTAH: Beaver, Beaver Dam, Honeyville, Koosharem, Nibley, Shivwits, Teasdale, Virgin, Whipup, Wildwood
VERMONT: Antrim, Cozy Corner, Essex, Hancock, Shaftsbury, Woodford
VIRGINIA: Allison Gap, Assawoman, Bloxom, Brightwood, Bumpass, Fancy Gap, Onancock, Pound, Short Pump, Tuckahoe
WASHINGTON: Babcock, Bangor, Baring, Big Bottom, Chimacum, Chuckanut, Chumstick, Humptulips, Kooskooskie, Packwood
WEST VIRGINIA: Bald Knob, Beech Bottom, Big Chimney, Big Sandy, Brohard, Cloverlick, Concepcion, Cougar, Cougar Valley, Cucumber, Droop, Floe, Johnson Crossroads, Knobs, Lick Creek, Longpole, Mercers Bottom, Nutterville, Organ Cave, Pickle Street, Pinch, Pipestern, Rimel, Romance, Sandlick, Stony Bottom, Wood
WISCONSIN: Breed, Cheat Lake, Dickeyville, Clam Falls, Imalone, Longwood, Sextonville, Spooner, Spread Eagle, Tainter
WYOMING: Goshen Hole, Hoback, McNutt, Meeteetse, Miner’s Delight, Ten Sleep
* Goodness! Sounds like our Founding Fathers could have used some more time with our Founding Mothers.
* The lesson here is, never let your 11-year-old son name the town.
* Were the people at Estately trying to make each other laugh while drinking milk?
* Hold on – I’m getting a call from— it looks like the FCC. Let’s take a break.

U.S. NEWS

AUDIO: ROBOTS FOR GRAMPA

Hundreds of older adults in New York state will be getting a new companion. The New York State Office for the Aging is providing more than 800 residents with a talking robot called ElliQ from Intuition Robotics. Similar to digital assistants such as Alexa and Siri, ElliQ is a voice-operated gadget that interacts with a human user. The gizmo was designed to make small talk and encourage activity in seniors. (* Like throwing it out the window!) It doesn’t wait to be asked a question. It proactively speaks up. It reads messages and displays photos from approved senders (such as family and friends), offers to play interactive games, and streams guided workouts designed for older adults. Intuition Robotics claims ElliQ projects empathy and builds trust with the user by getting to know its person better.
* Yeah, yeah, messages, games, workouts … how about something useful, like pre-chewing your food?
* Didn’t The Twilight Zone already prove these kind of things never work right?
* “Hey, Gramps – I know you can’t work a cell phone, much less sign up for a streaming service, but here’s a new robot companion for you!”
* I hope these things have an automatic shut off for when the elderly start yelling at them.
* I can think of a different kind of robot I’d want to help while away my Golden Years.
CLIP: Here’s an example of what the ElliQ can do for your elderly grandparent!
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)(com)/prep/wp-content/uploads/05-27-RobotForGrampa(dot)mp3

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

THE INCREDIBLE TWO-HANDED TRANSPLANT

A British man who lost the use of his hands to a rare disease has had them replaced in the world’s first double hand transplant. Steven Gallagher, 48, suffered from scleroderma, a condition where the skin hardens and tightens. His fingers and hands started curling into fists, he was in horrendous pain and unable to pick things up or even get dressed. After talking with doctors, he and his wife agreed to the operation because he was going to end up losing his hands anyway. The 12-hour operation back in December used a donor’s hands. He’s slowly regaining function – Steven can now pet his dog, turn on a tap and fill a glass of water. He’s hoping to be able to eventually get back to his job as a roofer.
* Good. I was worried that maybe his job was trapeze artist.
* Now that he can give two thumbs-up, he should consider a job as a film reviewer.
* Good thing they had a donor lined up. That was very handy.
* “Mr. Gallagher, your hands are here.” “Well? Hand ’em over!”
* So … those hands are second-hand.
* They had to have three spare hands standing by because after the operation, of course, you have to give a hand to the doctors.
* One problem: His fingerprint situation is seriously messed up.

MAN SUFFERS AMNESIA AFTER SEX WITH HIS WIFE

A man turned up at a hospital emergency room in Ireland with short-term memory loss brought about by daytime sex with his wife. A new medical case study in the May edition of the Irish Medical Journal documents how the 66-year-old man suffered from sudden onset amnesia or Transient Global Amnesia 10 minutes after having sex. He had a similar episode seven years before, where an amnesia event also happened within 10 minutes of sexual intercourse.
* Wow, how ugly is his wife?
* What this tells me is, he lives less than ten minutes from his local pub.
* He keeps complaining to his wife, “We never have sex any more!” And she’s going, “You’re kidding, right?”
* The doctors are now referring to this as Cosby Syndrome.
* They prescribed a pen and some Post-It Notes.

TRENDING

“INDIANA JONES 5” TO OPEN NEXT JUNE, 2023

Harrison Ford took the stage on Thursday at Star Wars Celebration in Anaheim, California to announce that “Indiana Jones 5” will be released on June 30, 2023. The fifth installment was directed by James Mangold. This will be the first time in the franchise’s four decades that Steven Spielberg didn’t direct an “Indiana Jones” movie, though he is a producer on the upcoming film. Ford will be 80 when the film opens next year. Also in the cast is Mads Mikkelsen, Antonio Banderas and Phoebe Waller-Bridge.

RAY LIOTTA DIES UNEXPECTEDLY

Actor Ray Liotta, who starred in the 1990 Martin Scorsese crime classic “Goodfellas” and co-starred in “Field of Dreams,” has died. He was 67. Liotta died in his sleep in the Dominican Republic, where he was shooting the film “Dangerous Waters.” Liotta leaves behind a daughter, Karsen. He was engaged to be married to Jacy Nittolo.

ALSO DEAD: ANDY FLETCHER/DEPECHE MODE; ALAN WHITE/YES

Two rock deaths were announced on Thursday:
1. Andy “Fletch” Fletcher, keyboardist and one of the founding members of iconic British electronic band Depeche Mode, has died. He was 60. Fletcher formed Depeche Mode in 1980 with Dave Gahan, Martin Gore and Vince Clarke. Over the course of Fletcher’s tenure with the group, they sold over 100 million records worldwide and had 54 songs chart on the UK Singles Chart. As a member of Depeche Mode, Fletcher was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2020.
2. Alan White, longtime drummer for progressive rock band Yes, died at home aged 72 after a short illness. White was one of the longest-running members of the group, having joined in 1972, replacing Bill Bruford. He got his big break while drumming for a band called Griffin when he was spotted by John Lennon, and asked to play with The Plastic Ono Band. White was asked to join Yes in 1972, and said he had only three days to learn the Yes repertoire for the Close to the Edge tour, which he did. As the Yes lineup continued to fluctuate over the years, White remained the rhythmic heart of the group throughout. “You want to keep the Yes name going to keep that high standard of musicianship and then carry it forward,” he said in 2015.

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

May 30, Monday – Memorial Day
June 14, Tuesday – Flag Day
June 19, Sunday – Father’s Day
June 21, Tuesday – Summer begins (The June solstice occurs at 5:14 A.M. EDT)
July 4, Monday – U.S. Independence Day
Sept. 5, Monday – Labor Day
Sept. 11, Sunday – Patriot Day
Sept. 22, Thursday – Fall begins, Equinox is 9:04 p.m. EDT

BIRTHDAYS

Jack McBrayer (actor, “The Middle,” “30 Rock”) … 49
Adam Carolla (comedian, podcaster) … 58
Richard Schiff (actor, “The Good Doctor,” “The West Wing”) … 67
Louis Gossett Jr. (actor) … 86

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody.”

(A) Vladimir Putin
(B) Kim Jong-un
(C) Adam Carolla

ANSWER: (C) Adam Carolla

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

COVID-19 in History:
2020 – According to the Johns Hopkins Coronavirus Resource Center, America’s COVID-19 death toll passed 100,000 – equal to the number of U.S. servicemen and women killed in Korea, Vietnam, Iraq and Afghanistan combined.
– Spain began 10 days of mourning for victims of COVID-19 with the death toll just under 27,000.

2019 – A global study of 711 sites determined that the world’s rivers were widely contaminated with antibiotics.
* That’s GOOD, right? No germs!

1998 – Charlie Sheen was admitted to a hospital in Los Angeles for a drug overdose.
* Winning! … another chance at life.

1995 – Actor Christopher Reeve was paralyzed when he was thrown from his horse during a jumping event in Charlottesville, Va.
* I would have gone with the stunt double.

1975 – The Alaska Supreme Court ruled as legal a law allowing up to four ounces of marijuana to be grown and possessed by private citizens.
* Wow – legal marijuana, the Northern Lights psychedelic display … all you’d need is a couple of Phish CDs and some pizzas.

1937 – San Francisco’s Golden Gate Bridge officially opened.
* It’s nice and all, but somebody got gypped. I’ve seen it, and it doesn’t have a golden gate.

1907 – The bubonic plague hit San Francisco.
* Coincidentally, this was shortly after the opening of the first “Jack In the Box.”

1647 – The first recorded American execution of a “witch” took place in Massachusetts.
* Well, so much for the religious tolerance stuff.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2009 – A credit card company sued Courtney Love, claiming she owed more than $350,000. In court papers filed in Los Angeles, American Express said it had suspended Love’s Amex Gold card after she “failed and refused” to make payments.

1994 – The Eagles played their first show in fourteen years when they played a show in Burbank, California. The two-and-a-half-hour show ended with two encores, closing with ‘Desperado’.

1977 – Declan McManus made his ‘live’ debut at the Nashville in London as Elvis Costello.

1963 – The album “The Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan” was released by Columbia in the USA. Establishing Dylan as a leader in the singer-songwriter genre and a supposed spokesman for the youth-orientated protest movement, it reached No.22 in the US charts and No.1 in the UK charts. “The Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan” showcased Dylan’s songwriting talent for the first time and propelled him to national and international fame.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. The average person will eat about 33 of THESE a year. What are they?
Donuts

2. According to recent statistics, the average person eats 21 of THESE a year. What are they?
Onions

3. 75% of adults eat one of THESE per year. What is it?
A grilled cheese sandwich

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