ELECTRIC CHOPSTICKS

A researcher at the University of Maine has made electric chopsticks that could – and there’s that word again, “could” – fight obesity by cutting sugar and salt intake. Electrodes embedded in the tips gently zap the tongue to produce simulated flavors. The creation of Dr. Nimesha Ranasinghe, the electric chopsticks deliver mild shocks to the taste buds that tweak sourness, saltiness and bitterness. He imagines that such technology could one day let people hack the flavor of their food while sticking to a healthy diet. “The flavor would be external to whatever you’re consuming,” he says. The team is now working on electrifying spoons, knives and forks that will help food taste better.
* “Hi, welcome to Arby’s. Here’s your food, and here are your electric chopsticks.”
* Judging by how much everybody weighs, it would appear food tastes just fine.
* I’m starving, plug me in.
* Of course, eventually your tongue gets acclimated, and by that time you have to start licking car batteries.
* “Sourness, saltiness and bitterness”? So everything tastes like Schweddy Balls, then.