TUESDAY, Mar 11 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR TUESDAY, March 11, 2025
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TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing – including “holidays” created by the National Day Calendar and Wellcat websites to drive traffic to their websites – or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

311 DAY
The National Today website says this:
“311 Day is celebrated annually on March 11. While we do have a number for emergency services, what happens when we have a legitimate question but it does not fall under the emergency category? The 311 system is exactly for that and it helps residents report issues, find out about city services, and solve queries. Baltimore was the first city to bring 311 into the works as a police non-emergency number in January 1999. Today, the 311 system is available in most major cities and is moving to smaller towns across the United States.”

OATMEAL NUT WAFFLES DAY

NATIONAL DREAM DAY
The National Today website says this:
“National Dream Day, celebrated annually on March 11, was created to make everyone, both old and young, realize that they can build and go after their dreams. It is inspired by “The Millennium Man,” Robert Muller, and is celebrated on his birthday every year. The Dream School Foundation, whose sole mission is to make every child’s dream come true, started the holiday especially for children, although it inspires all ages. Muller had amazing ideas concerning world peace and governance which motivated him to enter this millennium encouraging mankind to dream and act towards a better, more loving, and peaceful world.”

WORLD PLUMBING DAY

WORSHIP OF TOOLS DAY
The Busy Busy website says this:
“Worship of Tools Day is a lighthearted celebration dedicated to recognizing the importance of tools in our daily lives. It’s a day to honor the tools that help us build, create, and fix things, whether it’s in our homes or workplaces. Whether you’re a seasoned DIYer, a professional tradesperson, or just someone who appreciates a well-made tool, Worship of Tools Day offers a chance to celebrate and honor these essential instruments of innovation and productivity.”

March is:

Adopt a Rescued Guinea Pig Month
American Red Cross Month
Employee Spirit Month
Expanding Girls’ Horizons in Science and Engineering Month
Gender Equality Month
Irish-American Heritage Month
National Craft Month
National Women Inventors Month
National Women’s History Month
Read an E-Book Month

THE BUZZMOST OF US LIE TO OUR DENTIST

A recent survey found that more than half of Americans admit to fibbing about their dental habits during checkups. The survey of 2,000 Americans, by Aspen Dental, found 57% of Americans have lied to their dentist about their dental hygiene during appointments. The reason: they simply want to impress their dentist during office visits.
– A third (33%) said they simply didn’t want their dentist to think less of them.
– A fifth (20%) described their falsehoods as unintentional “panic lies” that accidentally slip out during appointments.
– The biggest lie, of course, is that you floss every day.
– The next biggest lie is that you brush for the recommended full two minutes.
* I’m sorry, but the biggest lie is when they ask “how are you doing today?” and your say “fine.”
* What are you supposed to say? “Yes, I do 30 minutes of dental calisthenics every morning”?
* This is where you get the expression “lying through your teeth.”
* This is almost as shocking as people lying to their doctor about their alcohol consumption.
* I’ll admit to lying about flossing if my dentist will admit that it really only costs about 10 bucks for teeth whitening, not $2,000.

STUDY: ATTRACTIVE WORKERS MAKE $20K MORE A YEAR THAN “UNATTRACTIVE” COWORKERS

Do better-looking people get more advantages in life? Well, duh. But a new survey conducted by Standout CV, a resume writing company, seems to bear that out. Some of the findings:
– 81% of respondents feel “pretty privilege” exists at work. People who rated themselves as very attractive reported earning an average of $20,000 a year more than those who saw themselves as unattractive.
– 66% have seen someone treated unfairly or talked about negatively because of how they look.
– 64% admitting they feel pushed to change their natural features — like straightening their hair or wearing makeup — just to fit in at the office. (* Boy, not around here! Ug!!!)
– Nearly half (46%) of those who rate themselves as unattractive say their looks hurt their careers.
– When asked to rate their workplace attractiveness, the average person gives themselves a 7.7 out of 10.
– Men tend to rate themselves higher: 37% rate themselves a 9 or a perfect 10, compared to 27% of women.
– Just over half (55%) admit to downplaying their appearance to be taken more seriously at work.
* “Very attractive” people might earn more, but I bet they get more STDs.
* On the bright side, people who are really unattractive could get paid more out of pity.
* I don’t know if you know this, but I actually make my voice about 30 percent less attractive so listeners will take me seriously. When I’m off the air, I sound like Morgan Freeman.
* I know we’re not the most attractive people in the world, but they had to take the security camera out of the studio here because we kept cracking the lens.
* Life was more fair when we all had to wear masks.

U.S. NEWS

GUY ROBS SAME GAS STATION FIVE TIMES

In Aurora, Colorado, a man was arrested last week for robbing gas station convenience stores. Five of the robberies occurred at the same store. Twenty-year-old Ross Woessner held up a Shell gas station five times. His first stick-up at the station was last July. His last was February 23 of this year. He was taken into custody March 4.
* Too bad. If you get ten robberies on your punch card you get a free large soda.
* This takes “returning to the scene of the crime” to a whole new level.
* By robbery number 4, he’d just text that he was on the way and they’d leave the money outside the door.
* Well, it IS a convenience store, and this one probably the most convenient to where he lives.
* Or his mom said not to leave the neighborhood.

DOG SHOOTS MAN IN BED WITH GIRLFRIEND

A Memphis man was shot in the leg while canoodling in bed with his lady friend. The dog did it. Jerald Kirkwood said he was lying in bed with a female friend “relaxing and talking” around 4 a.m. Monday when their dog, a 1-year-old pit bull (* big surprise) named Oreo, jumped on the bed, stepped on a gun the woman had left there and shot them. Mr. Kirkwood was left with a graze wound on the left thigh and was treated at the scene by responding paramedics.
* She had a pair of 36’s, the dog had a 22.
* Ironically, Mr. Kirkwood’s lady friend also complained about him firing off too soon.
* Why are they in bed with a loaded gun? To keep things exciting? That there’s a relationship red flag.
* Oreo is not the smartest cookie in the package.
* Just another argument for cats.
CLIP: Our “Let’s check in with the animals” sounder.
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)com/prep/wp-content/uploads/LetsCheckInWithTheAnimals(dot)mp3

AUDIO: LOCAL METEOROLOGIST BROADCASTS AS TORNADO HITS STUDIO

On Monday, a television meteorologist broadcast live on the air as a tornado hit his station’s studio in Lake Mary, Florida, near Orlando. The meteorologist, Brooks Garner on WOFL-TV Fox 35, was on the air broadcasting warnings to viewers when they turned on a camera just outside the studio and Garner recognized the edge of the tornado moving up I-4 and approaching his own building. He kept broadcasting as debris hit the building, and he warned station employees to get under their desks and for viewers to take shelter. The National Weather Service (* What’s left of it!) later said they found damage indicating it was an EF1 tornado, with winds from 86 to 110 miles per hour. At least one home collapsed, several others were damaged, but there were no reports of injuries or deaths.
* Well, THAT’S gonna get cut into a promo spot and aired three times an hour for the next six months.
* Viewers were blown away!
* “And now back to our blowhard anchorman, Ryan Elijah.”
* In Florida, they don’t even take the underwear off the clothesline for an EF1.
* How strong would it have to be for them to end up in Oz?
CLIP: Fox 35 meteorologist Brooks Garner broadcasts a live tornado.
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)com/prep/wp-content/uploads/TornadoLiveOnTV(dot)mp3

THE OLD “GENITAL INSPECTION” FLYER GAG

In Jefferson County, Colorado, just west of Denver, fraudulent flyers popped up on park restroom doors on Sunday stating that “random genital inspections” would start next month. The flyers used the Jefferson County sheriff office’s logo and said “In compliance with recent Executive Orders, the Jefferson County Sheriff’s Department will be conducting random genital inspections at all public restrooms beginning April 21.” Multiple residents reported the signs to the sheriff’s office on social media. The “random genital inspection” gag has been around since at least 2016. The flyers are designed to rile up the woke crowd. Or maybe the anti-woke crowd. Who knows these days. But, the Jefferson County Sheriff’s Office was not happy and put out a statement saying, “If we can identify those responsible for this alarming flyer, we will pursue the appropriate charges against them.”
* Charged with what? Felony joking with intent to chuckle?
* If restroom genital inspection were really a thing, wouldn’t it be in the penal code?
* Genital inspections? Pffft! I have nothing to hide. Uh – Let me rephrase that.
* First they came for the random genital inspectors and I said nothing. Then they came for my FBI Federal Breast Inspector card from Spencer’s at the mall, and there was no one to speak for me.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

HAVE A DEMON CALL AND SCOLD YOUR MISBEHAVING CHILDREN

There’s a phone app in Japan for parents of unruly kids. It’s called Oni kara Denwa, or “Phone Call from a Demon.” It’s like “Scared Straight” for your little ones. If your child is misbehaving, you can have a demon call your phone and scold your kid for their bad behavior. A Japanese comedian named Kintalo, famous for her extreme facial expressions, has been made up with a scary-looking red face, horns, fangs and pointed ears. When you need her help, you have the app call you and have your little brat answer the phone, and the demon face pops up and threatens them with one of five different messages depending on the problem:
– Kids who don’t listen to their parents
– Kids who won’t go to bed
– Kids who don’t eat their food
– Kids who fight with their siblings
– Kids who don’t keep their promises
* Yes, but it only works once unless you follow it up with a punishment of eternal suffering.
* So, it’s like a Skype call with my ex-wife?
* For really extreme cases, she’ll come over and pop out of your kid’s closet.
* If you really want a phone call from hell, call the IRS help line. Talk about eternity.

TRENDING

WENDY WILLIAMS TOSSES “HELP!” NOTE FROM ASSISTED LIVING WINDOW

Talk show host Wendy Williams was taken away from her New York assisted living facility by ambulance Monday after cops were called in for a wellness check when the ex-talk show queen tossed a handwritten note out the window begging for help. The note said: “Help! Wendy!!” The call came in at about 11:15 a.m. soon after the 60-year-old — who has been diagnosed with dementia — tossed the note from the window of her fifth-story room. The former TV star, who has been holed up in the facility’s memory ward as she fights to end her court-ordered guardianship, was later spotted at the window waving her arms at a reporter while speaking on the phone. Soon after, Williams silently walked out of the facility — escorted by a handful of cops — and was helped into the waiting ambulance. Williams had planned to make an appearance on ABC’s “The View” this Friday — her first daytime appearance since taking a leave of absence from her “The Wendy Williams Show” four years ago.

AUDIO: DICK VAN DYKE KNOCKED DEAD. I’M SORRY, I MEAN “KNOCKS ‘EM DEAD”.

Beloved 99-year-old Hollywood legend Dick Van Dyke performed with his a cappella group, The Vantastix, at the Vandy Camp fundraiser for fire relief in Malibu on Saturday. Van Dyke, who was joined by his wife, Arlene Silver, 53, and the other three singers at the event they hosted, performed a variety of songs, including “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.”
CLIP : We couldn’t find audio from this event, but we did find a clip of the Vantastix singing “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang” in a Denny’s restaurant just 8 years ago!
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)com/prep/wp-content/uploads/DickVanDyke-Age91-ChittyBang(dot)mp3

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

March 17, Monday – St. Patrick’s Day
March 20, Thursday – Spring begins, Spring Equinox is 5:01 a.m. EDT
April 1, Tuesday – April Fools Day
April 15, Tuesday – U.S. Tax Day
May 11, Sunday – Mother’s Day
May 26, Monday – Memorial Day

BIRTHDAYS

Jodie Comer (actress, “Free Guy,” “Killing Eve”) … 32
Rob Brown (actor, “Blindspot”) … 41
David Anders (actor, “iZombie,” “Once Upon a Time,” “The Vampire Diaries”) … 43
Terrence Howard (actor, “Fight Night: The Million Dollar Heist,” “Empire”) … 56
Elias Koteas (actor, “Chicago P.D.”) … 64
Jimmy Fortune (singer with The Statler Brothers) … 70
Rupert Murdoch (media mogul) … 94

Today’s Birthdays grade: A day of mostly TV birthdays, from a range of genres – adventure, drama, fantasy, spy thriller. Everybody’s fine … although some folks might have mixed feelings about Rupert Murdoch. Grade: C.

[Want to try something different with the daily birthdays? Try grading them! Some days have “good” celebs, some have “great” celebs, some have “lousy” celebs. For fun, give the group an arbitrary grade: A-plus through F-minus. Sidekick will give you our take on it; you can to take the concept and run with it.]

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“My future’s about trying to be a better man.”

(A) Harvey Weinstein
(B) Kevin Spacey
(C) Terrence Howard

ANSWER: (C) Terrence Howard

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2011 – An earthquake measuring 9.0 in magnitude struck mid-ocean 80 miles east of Sendai, Japan, triggering a tsunami killing thousands of people. The earthquake moved the main island of Japan 8 feet east, shifted the Earth on its axis by estimates of between 4 and 10 inches, and triggered the second largest nuclear accident in history: meltdowns at the Fukushima Nuclear Power Plant.
* The only good news: It did not wake up Godzilla.

2002 – Two columns of light mimicking the destroyed World trade Center twin towers soared skyward from Ground Zero in New York as a temporary memorial to the victims of the Sept. 11 attacks.
* It would have made a classy permanent memorial, but you can’t sell office space or charge rent inside columns of light.

1985 – Mikhail Gorbachev, the birthmark-on-the-forehead guy, became the head of the Soviet Union.
* Shortly before its downfall, but just in time for that “Hey, Mickey!” song.

1958 – The Air Force accidentally dropped an armed nuclear bomb into the back yard of Walter Gregg in Mars Bluff, South Carolina. (It did not detonate.)
* “Hey look – I’ll bet THIS will take care of our crabgrass!”

1892 – The first public basketball game was held in Springfield, Massachusetts.
* There were no luxury boxes, no cheerleaders, and no superstars with multi-colored hair. Gee, what was the attraction?

1888 – The most famous blizzard in American history hit the East Coast with 100 mph winds, dumping 40 to 70 inches of snow – the “Blizzard of 1888.”
* They were a little too busy digging out to think of a more creative name.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2008 – Madonna was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame at a star-studded ceremony in New York City, receiving the honor at the Waldorf Astoria Hotel from singer Justin Timberlake. The 49-year-old thanked her detractors in an acceptance speech, including those who “said I couldn’t sing, that I was a one hit wonder.” Rock star John Mellencamp, Leonard Cohen, The Ventures and The Dave Clark Five were also among the inductees.

2005 – The front door of Ozzy Osbourne’s childhood home in Birmingham, England went up for sale on eBay because the current owner was fed up with fans defacing it, saying over the years it had become a pilgrimage destination.

1997 – Paul McCartney was knighted by Queen Elizabeth II.

1967 – Music publisher Dick James announced that 446 different versions of the Paul McCartney song “Yesterday” had been recorded up to that time.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. According to surveys, THIS is the thing brides dread most about their wedding day. What is it?
The best man’s toast

2. Research shows THIS happens to 45% of men within 5 years of getting married. What is it?
They lose their wedding ring

3. About 11% of brides have THIS in common on their wedding day. What is it?
They’re pregnant

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