WEDNESDAY, Nov 15 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, November 15, 2023
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – Letters; THE ONLY MORNING SHOW IN TOWN

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

AMERICA RECYCLES DAY

NATIONAL BUNDT DAY

NATIONAL CLEAN OUT YOUR REFRIGERATOR DAY

NATIONAL RAISIN BRAN CEREAL DAY

PACK YOUR MOM’S LUNCH DAY

November is:

Adopt a Senior Pet Month
Great American Smoke Out Month
National Adoption Month
National Military Family Month
National Native American Heritage Month
Raisin Bread Month
Stamp Collecting Month
Vegan Month

THE BUZZ

AM I THE A-HOLE FOR NOT FOLDING MY BOYFRIEND’S CLOTHES RIGHT?

A woman posted to Reddit’s “Am I The A-hole” (Or, more politely, Am I the Jerk?) explaining that she does all the laundry because she works from home, and has discovered that a large amount of his clothes come out of the dryer inside-out. She writes, “Maybe this is petty but I started folding his clothes the way they come out of the dryer. I don’t have time to stand there and figure out how to untangle his shirts. Now he’s upset because his clothes are super wrinkly. I said I didn’t care because I’m doing him a favor and that the least he could do is make sure his shirts are ‘normal’ when they get put into the hamper.”
PHONE TOPIC: So who’s being the jerk here? If you don’t like it, do the job yourself. Or, if you’re going to do the laundry, do it right.

ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS TO NEVER HEAR THAT SONG

According to a new survey of 1,000 people by CouponBirds, by the time Christmas Day rolls around, 30.8% of people reported disliking Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You.” Here are the Top Five “I’m Sick of Hearing These By Christmas” Songs:
1. “All I Want For Christmas Is You”
2. “Jingle Bell Rock” by Bobby Helms
3. “Last Christmas” by Wham!
4. “White Christmas” by Bing Crosby
5. “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” by Andy Williams
6. “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” by Brenda Lee
* And Paul McCartney dodges a bullet.
* Hmm. A week from Thanksgiving. Yep, it’s time to never enter a store without wearing AirPods.
* Where exactly do you go to have something declared a crime against humanity?
* Let’s have a moment of silence for our brothers and sisters working in the stores and malls where Christmas music has already begun rotting their brains.

U.S. NEWS

SANTA TRAIN ENGINEER ARRESTED FOR BEING HIGH ON METH

A Tennessee man was arrested after he allegedly drove children, riding in a Christmas tractor train, while high on meth, on Saturday. It happened in Tazewell, Tennessee. Henry Meade was driving “Santa’s Choo Choo” – a motorized lawn mower pulling carts of children – when witnesses noticed that he was acting erratically. Police say Meade was unsteady on his feet and failed a field sobriety test. Police found meth, narcotics and a syringe when they took him into custody.
* “Those aren’t mine! Those belong to Rudolph!”
* Well that’s a fine way for Santa to conduct himself.
* Santa had a little toot before the train ride, kids.
* Now all he wants for Christmas… is bail.
* You don’t often see those little kiddie trains going 65 miles an hour.

FLORIDA SUSPECT CRASHES CAR, HAS UNSURPRISING TATTOO

A Florida man was arrested after leading cops on a chase following reports of car burglaries. Deputies responded to a report of a car burglary in the town of Davenport at around 3:28 a.m. on Monday. A man and a woman were seen trying to break into several vehicles. As deputies closed in on the car, it sped away through the neighborhood, eventually slamming into a parked car. When the suspect, Timothy Allen Hogue, emerged from the car, deputies noticed he had a tattoo on his neck that said, “All gas, no brakes.”
* No brakes! Dude needs to get his butt to Midas.
* I wonder how many miles per hour he’ll be going in his cell?
* No brakes??? Oh, stop!
* He had a bunch of other tattoos, too:|
– All scheme and no escape plan.
– All streets and no map.
– All car and no insurance.

HORSE LOOSE ON AIRPLANE

A cargo plane that departed New York’s John F. Kennedy International Airport had to turn around shortly after take-off when a horse got loose on board after managing to escape his stall. Pilots said they had no problem flying-wise, but no one could get the horse secured. A veterinarian was brought in to check on the horse once the plane was back on the ground, and the flight to Liege, Belgium, departed again later in the day.
* It burst from its stall and shouted, “This airline food is crap!”
* It also complained about lack of legroom.
* Horses don’t usually take transatlantic flights, but this one is a trust fund brat.
* The horse reportedly kept trying to push the fire suppression engine cutoff buttons in the cockpit.
* “This is your captain speaking. We’re gonna mosey on up to 30,000 feet, then gallop on over to Belgium.”

WHY IS THE LABEL ON THE CRANBERRY SAUCE CAN UPSIDE-DOWN

Every year, America asks… Why is the label on the can of cranberry sauce always upside down? Ocean Spray, the company who makes the cranberry sauce, explains – again, like they do every year: The can is produced “upside down” because the part that looks like the bottom (which, in this case, is the top) contains an air bubble. This allows you to easily break the seal between the cranberry sauce and the can, thus releasing the jellied blob o’ glorious nectar intact and perfectly can-shaped—onto your plate.
* …and not shredded and mushed into a green debris field like your aunt’s lime jello salad.
* Would it kill them to put the explanation ON THE LABEL???
* Like the open hole in the tab you push up and over to open a can of soda. You know that hole is meant to put a straw in, right? You did know that, yes?
* Now you know. Next time on Thanksgiving Corner, we’ll be learning why you are always stuck at the kid’s table.

ALMANACNOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

Nov. 23, Thursday – Thanksgiving
Dec. 21, Thursday – Winter begins, winter solstice occurs at 10:27 P.M. EST
Dec. 25, Monday – Christmas
Dec. 31, Sunday – New Year’s Eve
Jan. 1, Monday – New Year’s Day 2024

BIRTHDAYS

Sean Murray (actor, “NCIS”) … 46
Chad Kroeger (singer, guitarist with Nickelback) … 49
Jay Harrington (actor, “S.W.A.T.”) … 52
Jack Ingram (country singer) … 53
Steve Fossen (bass player with Heart) … 74
Anni-Frid Lyngstad (singer with Abba, ex-wife of Benny) … 78
Sam Waterston (actor, “Law and Order”) … 83
Petula Clark (singer, real name Sally Owen) … 91

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“Happy wife, happy life. I think every man learns that quick. Really quick.”

(A) Johnny Depp
(B) Tiger Woods
(C) Chad Kroeger

ANSWER: (C) Chad Kroeger

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2013 – Sony launched the Playstation 4, selling one million units on the first day.
* Easily making enough money to start work on the Playstation 5.

2012 – British Petroleum agreed to pay criminal fines of $4.5 billion in the Deep Water Horizon Oil Spill case.
* This time, it was a gusher of cash.

1995 – Lee Jee-Yung became the first person to bungee jump from a flying paraglider in South Korea.
* It was the best adult diaper commercial ever made.

1937 – The first congressional session in air-conditioned chambers was held.
* After more than 100 years, finally a solution to all that hot air!

1926 – NBC debuted, as a radio network of 24 stations.
* “Hey, I don’t get why we’re using a peacock to symbolize radio??”

1904 – King Camp Gillette invented the first razor with disposable blades.
* But he never thought of selling it with teeny tiny bits of toilet paper.

1806 – Explorer Zebulon Pike spotted the mountaintop now known as Pikes Peak.
* He came THIS CLOSE to naming it “Zebulon’s Zenith.”

1777 – The Continental Congress approved the Articles of Confederation, precursor to the U.S. Constitution.
* Even back then congress had a knack for multiplying the paperwork.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2007 – Jay-Z went to No.1 on the U.S. album chart with “American Gangster,” his 10th No.1 album. This made the rapper joint second with Elvis Presley for the most No.1 albums on the chart; only The Beatles have had more, with 19. Since 1998, all eight of Jay-Z’s solo studio albums have hit No. 1, in addition to his “Collision Course” project with Linkin Park and his “Unfinished Business” collaboration with R. Kelly.

2005 – Carrie Underwood released her debut album “Some Hearts,” which won the 2006 Billboard Album of the Year.

2000 – Michael Abram, the Liverpool man who stabbed George Harrison after breaking into his home, was found not guilty due to mental problems, and was institutionalized.

1992 – Ozzy Osbourne announced his retirement after a gig in California, saying: “Who wants to be touring at 46?”

1990 – David Bowie opened on Broadway in the title role of “The Elephant Man.”

1990 – Milli Vanilli producer Frank Farian held a press conference to confirm the rumors that the two members of the group Rob and Fab had not sung on their records.

1980 – Kenny Rogers started a six-week run at No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “Lady,” a song written and produced by Lionel Richie.

1969 – Janis Joplin was arrested in Tampa, FL on charges of using “vulgar and indecent language” at a concert. All the charges were eventually dropped.

1965 – The Rolling Stones appeared on NBC-TV’s “Hullabaloo” television show. The band performed “Get Off My Cloud.”

1959 – Johnny and the Moondogs, (The Beatles), played in the final round of the “TV Star Search” competition at The Hippodrome Theatre, Manchester, England.

1956 – “Love Me Tender,” the first film starring Elvis Presley, premiered in New York.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. 7% of men surveyed have ruined a date by doing THIS. What is it?
Locking their keys in their car

2. 75% of men have made this mistake on a date. What is it?
Ordered before their date

3. 25% of men have tried to impress dates by doing this. What is it?
Pretending to be wine buffs

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