THURSDAY, Sept 7 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR THURSDAY, September 7, 2023
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: KENTUCKY FRIED OSTRICH; BROUGHT TO YOU BY

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

GOOGLE COMMEMORATION DAY
In January of 1996, Stanford University Ph.D. students Sergey Brin and Larry Page began a research project to create an internet search engine. They developed an algorithm tagged “PageRank,” which used a unique system to identify the relationships between websites and assign a relevance value to a site based on the number of links it had to others. They eventually chose the name Google (a misspelling of “googol”) because it represents the number 1 followed by 100 zeros, symbolizing Google’s commitment to providing information and the infinite nature of information on the web. Page and Brin registered their domain name on September 15, 1997. After raising about $1,000,000 from investors, they incorporated and opened shop in a room attached to a garage in Menlo Park, California, on September 7, 1998.

GRANDMA MOSES DAY
The National Day Calendar website says this:
“Happy Birthday to Anna Mary Robertson Moses, aka Grandma Moses (September 7, 1860 – December 13, 1961). She’s an example to us all of an individual who successfully began a career in the arts at an advanced age. A renowned American folk artist, Grandma Moses first started painting in her 70s after arthritis made it difficult to embroider, her original medium. Known most of her life as either ‘Mother Moses’ or ‘Grandma Moses,’ she was discovered when Louis J. Caldor saw her work in a drugstore window in Hoosick Falls, New York. An amateur art collector, Caldor convinced the Museum of Modern Art to include Moses in a folk art show for members only. This eventually lead to a one-woman show. While Moses displayed her work under the name Mrs. Moses, the press eagerly dubbed her ‘Grandma Moses’ and the name stuck.”

NATIONAL ACORN SQUASH DAY

NATIONAL BEER LOVER’S DAY

NATIONAL THREATENED SPECIES DAY

NEITHER SNOW NOR RAIN DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“Neither Rain Nor Snow Day celebrates the opening of the New York Post Office building on this day in 1914. This inscription was made on the building: ‘Neither snow nor rain not heat nor gloom of night, stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.’ A lot of people assume the inscription represents the Post Office motto. In fact it’s very close to the old Pony Express rider’s motto. A lot of people assume the Pony Express was a government funded predecessor to today’s Post Office. But the Pony Express was a privately owned and funded courier and message delivery service.”

SALAMI DAY

September is:

Baby Safety Month
Better Breakfast Month
Chicken Month
Classical Music Month
Hispanic Heritage Month
Honey Month
Little League Month
National Piano Month
Self Improvement Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

WHAT TO WATCH – New and Returning Shows and Movies
Premiering Thursday through Sunday
Listings sourced from the TV Guide and EW websites.

THURSDAY, Sept 7

Season Premiere:
Netflix – “Top Boy”

FRIDAY, Sept 8

“The Changeling”
Apple TV+ – New Series
Synopsis: Set in an alternate New York City, a father and husband searches through a magical world for his abducted son and missing wife.
(Premieres Sept 8 at 12 a.m. ET)

Season Premiere:
Netflix – “Selling The OC”

SUNDAY, Sept 10

“The Walking Dead: Daryl Dixon”
AMC – New Series
Synopsis: Daryl Dixon heads to France where he’s tasked with escorting a child who may be the key to saving humanity across an undead-ridden landscape. Just like “The Last of Us”!

CHRISTINE BAUMGARTNER WILL JUST HAVE TO GO BACK TO WORK

Kevin Costner’s estranged wife, Christine Baumgartner, revealed her plans for the future amid her contentious divorce from the “Yellowstone” star. In court last week, the judge reduced Costner’s child support payments to $63,000 per month. Baumgartner, 49, talking about how she’ll support herself moving forward, said, “I will look into the steps I need to take and any schooling I need to do, and I will enter the workforce.” She is currently living in a $40,000-a-month rental home in Montecito, California.
* Burger King’s hiring.
* Sub-let the house to someone else and be the maid?
* Once again: the rich are not so different from you or me, huh?
* A good career choice would be Professional Shopper, because she’s obviously good at spending other people’s money.
* Just please – not another celebrity podcast.

THE BUZZ

THREE DUMB HEADLINES

Time for another episode of Three Dumb Headlines. These are actual, word-for-word headlines of stories found on the internet. There’s no story, no context, just the actual headline. Discuss them amongst yourselves. Then, encourage listeners to vote for the Dumbest Headline on your station’s social media page. Maybe ask them to leave a comment. Reveal the results in the next break.
Today’s Dumb Headlines:
1. “Read This If You Never Take Your Shoes Off When You Go Into Your House”
2. “Why Getting Stabbed By A Lightsaber Would Be Really, Really Bad”
3. “7 Controversial Ways People Use Ketchup”
And here’s a spare, in case you don’t like one of those three: “Paris Jackson Defends Her Armpit Hair from Social Media Trolls”

SOMETHING YOU CAN’T TELL YOUR PARTNER

Reddit asked, “What’s something you can’t tell your partner for fear of upsetting them?” Some of the responses:
– “The first piece of jewellery I bought my wife was a necklace. We went on vacation and she lost it. I emailed the hotel and of course they hadn’t found it. So I bought a replacement and told my wife they found it.”
– “I can’t tell them that they pronounce ‘meme’ as ‘me-me.’ It physically hurts me.”
– “I only put spiders outside when she sees them. If they’re only noticed by me I let them continue hunting bugs, sometimes with a few soft words of encouragement.”
– “I don’t like your new hair cut and it has made me marginally less attracted to you.”
– “I hate your mom and I’m a little afraid you’re going to turn into her, both physically and personality wise.”
– “I sometimes wish we had separate beds. I miss sprawling out and sleeping on an angle.”
– “That 90% of what they think is recyclable, is not.”
– “That I slept with her best friend before they ever knew each other. (Back in high school) It’s just something that is not needed to be known.”
– “If my mom wants to hide literally anything from my dad, no matter what it is, she just puts it somewhere where he would have to bend over to see it.”
– “I can’t tell her how many guitars I actually have.”
* PHONE TOPIC: Do you have something you can’t tell your partner? (Watch out for the really serious stuff, like mental issues or secret families!)

U.S. NEWS

CONTEST: WHEEL OF FLORIDA MAN: ASSAULT WITH SNICKERS

(Play the sounder, ask listeners to guess the missing word.)
Wheel of Florida Man sounder URL: morningsidekick(dot)(com)/prep/wp-content/uploads/WheelOfFloridaMan-Intro(dot)mp3
Contest: A Lakeland, Florida man was arrested for pelting several Walgreens employees with [BLANK].
The story: A Florida man was arrested for pelting several Walgreens employees with Snickers candy bars. Police say a “highly intoxicated” 23-year-old Noy Idel became agitated when employees at the Clearwater Walgreens refused to sell him a box of cigarettes. Angered, Mr. Idel allegedly “became irate and threw Snickers bars” at the store’s manager, hitting him in the face. Another store employee rushed over to help and ordered Idel to leave the store. In response, Idel threw “several Snickers bars” at the employee, striking them in the chest. Idel was arrested and charged with battery.
* At least he didn’t THROW batteries! Ouch!
* I’ll bet you the evidence didn’t make it back to the station house.
* Throwing Snickers bars – that’s Nutrageous!
* He paid his bail with a 100 Grand Bar.
* It’s true – you’re not yourself when you’re hangry.

THE OLD HEART ATTACK GETAWAY TRICK ALMOST WORKS

On Tuesday, a group of four suspects – a man and three women – were seen ransacking a Macy’s department store in Los Angeles’ Brea Mall. Police were aware of the robbers and were waiting for them outside of the mall. But the group managed to get to their getaway car (* That’s some fine police work, Lou.) and sped off leading police on a high speed chase. The cops lost them, and the four ditched the car and ran into a dental office, with one of the suspects faking a heart attack. The dentist went through all of the emergency protocols until the victim said, ‘Oh, I feel much better,’ and jumped out and ran out the front door into a waiting rideshare that one of them had called to pick them up. But… it didn’t work. The cops quickly surrounded the car and took them into custody.
* “Don’t surprise me like that! I could have another heart attack!”
* What’s worse, one of them has something on an upper molar that needs watching.
* Fortunately, dentists are ready for dealing with heart attacks, when they give you the bill for that new crown.
* Wasn’t this story a plot on the TV show “The Rookie”?

NEW JERSEY MAN SABOTAGED BACKYARD POOLS

A New Jersey man has been arrested for using a drone to drop green dye into backyard swimming pools, turning the pool water green and making them unusable. Patrick Spina IV, 45, was arrested Monday after allegedly terrorizing local pools for months with sea dye, which is normally used by search and rescue teams to mark spots in the ocean. Besides hitting several backyard pools, Spina also hit the swimming pool at the Quality Inn motel in Galloway, New Jersey, dozens of times since late June. Working with the Federal Aviation Administration, police spotted the offending drone flying on Sept. 1, and officials tracked it to Spina’s Comfort Solutions Heating and Cooling business in Galloway. Spina was booked on multiple counts of criminal mischief.
* I bet Patrick Spina the Fifth is busy changing his name right now.
* “Okay, who had asparagus last night???”
* When the victims looked across at their neighbors’ untainted pools, they were – yep – green with envy.
* I could understand this if he sold screened-in covered porches. But Heating & A/C?
* “They’re not swimming, so therefore they will go inside where they need air conditioning, and when it doesn’t work they will call me.” Brilliant plan.

HELP WANTED: ARCHERS

The City of Pittsburgh is looking for archers to go bow hunting in two city parks to help control the deer population. The city will hire 30 archers to hunt deer in Frick Park and Riverview Park. To be eligible, a person must live in Allegheny County, Pennsylvania, and have a clean background check. After being selected from a lottery and passing the background check, you will be required to perform an accuracy test. If you pass that, you are good to grab your bow and go. Hunters will not be permitted to use bait.
* There will be no mass deer bating in Pittsburgh parks.
* Wow, the deer are really getting the shaft.
* City-approved bow hunting. I bet the archery world is all a-quiver.
* Is Hawkeye busy? He could have the parks cleaned up in a weekend.

THE REAL GLOBAL WARMING VICTIMS: THEME PARKS

The largest theme park companies — Six Flags, SeaWorld and Cedar Point-parent Cedar Fair — report that they all were upended by extreme weather this year, including deadly flooding in the Northeast, record-breaking heat in the Southwest and California, and wildfires in Canada. Extreme heat in Florida also disrupted attendance at Walt Disney World and Universal Orlando this summer.
– Cedar Fair, which also owns Canada’s Wonderland in Ontario and Knott’s Berry Farm in California, said that Canadian wildfires and extreme heat in California impacted attendance by 300,000 visits during its latest quarter. (*Also – the berries at Knott’s Berry Farm? Little dried-out balls.)
– SeaWorld attendance fell 2% last quarter from the same time a year prior. The decline was “primarily due to significantly adverse weather,” including rainfall and the fallout from Canadian wildfires. (* Who wants to get wet at SeaWorld? Nobody.) Plus, extreme weather in recent years has caused park closures and attendance drops in Florida, Texas and Virginia.
– Six Flags blames unusually high rainfall in the Northeast and a record heat wave in the South. Six Flags is adding more shaded structures, water misters, splash zones and air-conditioned areas. They are planning to build more indoor and air-conditioned rides.
* Come on, kids, we’re all going to the amusement warehouse!
* Pretty soon, your favorite ride is going to be just getting squirted by a fire hose.
* Coming soon: Six Flags Iceland.
* They ought to rename some of the rides:
– Tilt-a-Sweat
– Merry-Go-Pant
– Twilight Zone Tower of Toasty
– Harry Hotter World
– It’s a Heat Stroke After All
– Perspirates of the Caribbean

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

GREEK BARS RE-SERVING UNFINISHED DRINKS TO TOURISTS

Bars in the party destination town of Kavos on the island of Corfu, Greece were recently raided by officials for tax evasion and selling smuggled alcohol. The operation was carried out last week. But what was most disturbing was that seven of the bars that were raided were known to have their bartenders collect unfinished drinks, and save them in barrels to be served again to other customers as shots. Those businesses were closed for 48 hours and were fined.
* They’ll never do THAT again, not with that kind of punishment.
* Good to see a country so committed to recycling.
* “I’ll have what she’s having.” “You’re already having what she had yesterday, sir.”
* “Try our special Happy Hour cocktail – the Backwash.”

TRENDING

JIMMY BUFFET GETS A FAREWELL PARADE IN KEY WEST

Jimmy Buffett, who died Friday after a four-year bout with skin cancer, got a big sendoff when hundreds of his loyal fans celebrated his life with a raucous party and a parade in Key West, Florida. Hundreds of Parrotheads strutted down Duval Street in Hawaiian shirts and leis while singing some of Buffett’s most iconic songs like “Cheeseburger in Paradise” and “Margaritaville.” They left liquor bottles, flowers and notes outside of Buffett’s old Key West recording studio Shrimp Boat Sound.

DRAKE POSES WITH ALL THE BRAS THROWN AT HIM DURING TOUR

Drake has posted a picture of himself posing in front of hundreds of bras that have been tossed on stage during his summer tour. Over the summer, a woman went viral for tossing her 36D bra at Drake during one of his shows. Since then, fans have joined in lobbing their lingerie at the star throughout his ongoing It’s All a Blur Tour. Wednesday, Drake showed off his grand collection of what is estimated to be about 400 bras.

BEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD: SWITZERLAND

U.S. News & World Report put out their annual Best Countries rankings. Switzerland grabs the top spot for the second year in a row. The Top 10:
1. Switzerland
2. Canada
3. Sweden
4. Australia
5. United States
6. Japan
7. Germany
8. New Zealand
9. United Kingdom
10. Netherlands

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

Sept. 11, Monday – Patriot Day
Sept. 15, Friday – National POW/MIA Recognition Day (The third Friday of September)
Sept. 23, Saturday – Fall begins (Autumn Equinox is 2:50 a.m. EDT)
Oct. 9, Monday – Columbus Day
Oct. 16, Monday – National Boss’s Day
Oct. 31, Tuesday – Halloween

BIRTHDAYS

Jonathan Majors (actor, “Lovecraft Country,” “Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania”) … 34
Evan Rachel Wood (actress, “Westworld”, “True Blood”) … 36
Alyssa Diaz (actress, “The Rookie”) … 38
Angie Everhart (actress, model) … 54
Corbin Bernsen (actor) … 69
Chrissie Hynde (singer/songwriter with “The Pretenders”) … 72
Julie Kavner (actress, Marge on “The Simpsons”) … 73
Gloria Gaynor (singer) … 80

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“Being on tour sends me crazy. I drink too much and out comes the John McEnroe in me.”

(A) John Tesh
(B) Barry Manilow
(C) Chrissie Hynde

ANSWER: (C) Chrissie Hynde

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2014 – Asteroid 2014 RC flew past Earth at a distance of only 24,800 miles.
* Better luck next time.

1984 – American Express Co. issued the first of its Platinum charge cards.
* And Americans’ budgets officially began going to hell.

1966 – The final episode of the original “The Dick Van Dyke Show” was aired on CBS-TV.
* And it would take the next 20 years for people to get that theme song out of their heads.

1921 – The first Miss America Pageant was held at Atlantic City, NJ.
* And they actually showed some ANKLE!

1915 – John Gruelle patented the Raggedy Ann doll.
* It’s considered to be the earliest appearance of “grunge” in America.

1813 – The character of “Uncle Sam” was created to symbolize the United States.
* The creator had this uncle Samuel who was always coming around for money …

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2016 – The Chainsmokers featuring Halsey were at No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “Closer.” The song stayed at the top spot for 12 consecutive weeks and topped the charts in more than ten countries. The song went on to become the first song to spend 26 weeks in the top five of the Billboard Hot 100 chart. It also became only the second song in the history of the Hot 100 chart to spend 32 weeks in the top ten of the chart.

2007 – A new study revealed that rock stars were twice as likely as the rest of us to die early. Researchers said that the problem was so bad the industry should be labeled a “high risk” profession.

2001 – Michael Jackson was reunited onstage with the Jackson Five at his 30th Anniversary Celebration in New York City’s Madison Square Garden. It ended Jackson’s 11-year hiatus from performing in the U.S. Jackson was joined by Eminem, Whitney Houston, Gladys Knight, Britney Spears and Destiny’s Child to celebrate the 30th anniversary of his singing career.

1996 – Rapper Tupac Shakur was shot on the Las Vegas Strip; he died six days later at age 25.

1986 – Michael Nesmith joined the other original Monkees on stage for the first time since the group disbanded.

1978 – Keith Moon, drummer for The Who, died in London after overdosing on Hemenephirin at the age of 31. He was taking the prescription drug to help him with alcohol.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. 53% of married women surveyed can’t get their husbands to do THIS. What is it?
Go to see a chick flick

2. 56% of ladies surveyed admitted they do THIS secretly so their man doesn’t find out. What is it?
They use his razor to shave their legs

3. Women in a recent survey said THIS is the #1 gift they never want to receive from their husbands. What it is?
A gym membership

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