NEIMAN MARCUS FANTASY GIFT CATALOGUE

Have an extra million or two laying around? Here are some of the items from this year’s Neiman Marcus Fantasy Holiday Gift Catalogue:
– A $3.2 million Diamond Tiara: “Created in 1935, the extraordinary halo head ornament is set with 520 brilliant, single-cut diamonds of approximately 42.15 carats, as well as 92 baguette diamonds of approximately 8.03 carats. The peak of the tiara is tipped with an approximately 1.05-carat half-moon-shaped diamond. This mesmerizing work of art has been locked away in a private vault for 12 years and has never been offered for sale—until now.”
– A Maserati Grecale Trofeo SUV painted in iconic Barbie pink. Cost: $330,000.
– VIP tickets to a polo tournament in Aspen, Colorado, and one-on-one lessons with two polo champions. Comes with a two-night stay at The St. Regis Aspen Resort, and a private Argentinian asado dinner by chef Agustin Mallmann. Cost: $295,000
– A Customized 9-Hole Miniature Golf Course by Sweet Tooth Hotel — the “immersive and experiential art installation experts.” You’ll also receive 20 custom putters and 20 golf balls. Cost: $200,000.
– Shoot hoops with the legendary Scottie Pippen and his son, rising star Scotty Pippen Jr. in Los Angeles.Cost: $333,333.
Or, if you really need to cheap out this year:
– Master luxury designer and special occasion decorator Jim Marvin, who has decorated the White House, will decorate your home. “Marvin will welcome you into a private showroom to discuss your custom curations and present you with an enticing array of options. Once your exclusive pieces are created, the designer and his team will install your very own Christmas wonderland in time for a holiday reveal. Following the big unveiling, you and seven guests will enjoy a private, three-course Christmas meal prepared by a Neiman Marcus executive chef, paired with selected wines, and served by two waitstaff.” Cost: $190,000.
* Y’know … nothin’s really grabbin’ me this year.
* Although, the private polo lessons are tempting. I’m tired of being humiliated in front of my whole polo team.
* Remember their slogan: “You’ll find everything from excessively overpriced to unreasonably extravagant at Neiman Marcus.”
* Boy, that pesky inflation really is sneaking into everywhere, huh?
* Somehow, this is the one catalogue that never reaches my mailbox. But I get twenty from Pottery Barn.