ARABS TO CENSOR STATUE OF DAVID

Someone thought it would be a good idea to display a life-sized copy of Michaelangelo’s famous statue of David at the United Arab Emirates World Expo in Dubai. But once it arrived at the Italian pavilion, they were told by Arab officials that they could not display David’s – how to put this delicately – his butt and his wang. It is considered too embarrassing to Arab men — not to mention illegal in Dubai – to show nudity. The statue is a 17-foot resin 3-D printed exact replica of the statue that’s standing in his birthday suit at the Accademia Museum in Florence. Artistic director Davide Rampello, in charge of the display, came up with the solution of building a stage between his upper and lower parts. On the top floor, which is open to the public, you can see David’s torso, upper arms, shoulders and head. On the lower floor, which is strictly reserved for VIPs, visitors can see the naughty bits. Another Italian working on the project said, “We even thought of putting on underwear. We realized late that it was a mistake to bring a statue of a naked man to the Emirates.”
* They’ve got his feet down in the basement. You know, for foot fetishists.
* Would David be wearing boxers or briefs? Or boxer briefs? Or a green mankini, like Borat?
* The obvious solution is to put that sling he has over his shoulder to more practical use.
* Too embarrassing to Arab men? David’s a little embarrassed, too. And I do mean little.
* It’s Elvis on the Ed Sullivan Show all over again.