STUDY: CHOCOLATE MAKES YOU SMARTER

(March, 2016) A study, published recently in the research journal Appetite, indicated that people who eat chocolate at least once a week saw their memory and abstract thinking improve. Examining data from a study on cognitive abilities of more than 1,000 people in the state of New York in the 1970s, researchers looked at the cognitive tests of participants who ate chocolate less than once a week and those who ate it at least once a week. They found eating chocolate was strongly linked to superior brain function. The benefits would mean you would be better at daily tasks “such as remembering a phone number, or your shopping list, or being able to do two things at once, like talking and driving at the same time”.
(study is here: http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0195666316300459)
* Or driving and eating a candy bar at the same time.
* Well, call me Einstein.
* I eat a lot of chocolate. If I’m so smart, why am I working in radio?
* You would be better at daily tasks “such as remembering a phone number, or your shopping list”? But we have phones that do that stuff now.
* Wait – Americans eat 100 pounds of chocolate every second. Why are there so many idiots out there?
* If chocolate makes you smart, why doesn’t Switzerland have a colony on Mars?
* Maybe you’re brain is just more interested, wondering when the next chocolate is going to happen.
* You know the shocking thing here? That they have the nerve to call this a study.
* A study of 1,000 people in the state of New York in the 1970s? Look them up and see how great their lives turned out thanks to the extra brain power.
* Let’s start with “ate chocolate less than once a week” What happens if that one time you eat chocolate every few weeks you go crazy with a half gallon of ice cream?
* Meanwhile “more than once a week” could just mean two chocolate mints.
* But it’s the leap they make. They find a difference in the data, and then they jump over the Grand Canyon making conclusions about it.
* The best thing to do here is keep eating chocolate and hope for the best.