GREY SQUIRREL LASAGNA
Nutty.
ROBBER FOILED BY BANANA, SPLITS
A banana a day keeps the robber away.
ELDERLY WOMEN HAVE SNOW SHOVEL FIGHT
Tough old birds.
THE BRATWURST HOTEL
All sausage, all the time.
WOMAN FINDS LOST PUPPY DURING MARATHON
Carries it 19 miles to finish line.
FLIGHT WAS SO BUMPY, PASSENGERS GOT A REFUND
110mph crosswinds.
STOLEN PENGUINS FOUND
No, not on the telly.