MAN STABBED WITH SCISSORS WHILE COOKING HOTEL WAFFLE
Snuck up on him syruptitiously.
SAKS FIFTH AVENUE TO OFFER TATTOOING
In the window.
WOMAN WINS BOSTON MARATHON
First time since 1985.
MAN'S DASHCAM CATCHES HIM BURGLARIZING STORE
Sure, officer, you can review my dashcam.
AUDIO: SOYLENT TO BE SOLD IN WALMART
Just avoid the green Soylent.