CRAZY EX-GIRLFRIEND SABOTAGED MAN’S MUSICAL CAREER
Clarinet? Clari-NOT!
FRENCH POLICE STOP TERRORIST PLOT TO BOMB SEX CLUB
One big bang in exchange for another.
PSYCHIC CAT TO PREDICT WORLD CUP WINNERS
So far: 100%. (one game)
WOMAN CALLS 911 OVER SLOW PIZZA
Alcohol was NOT involved.
DRUNK MAN HAD INFLATABLE DOLL ON AIRPLANE
Plane diverts.
WHALE TRAINER PUTS LIPSTICK ON A BELUGA
It’s adorable. But don’t do it.
MCDONALD’S BATHROOM RESTRICTIONS IN AUSTRALIA
Bathroom code is on the receipt.
THE MAN WITH THE LEECH UP HIS NOSE
For two weeks.
OLDEST WOMAN IN WORLD TURNS 129, STILL WISHES SHE WERE DEAD
“I have not had a single happy day in my life.”