THE BRATWURST HOTEL
All sausage, all the time.
WOMAN FINDS LOST PUPPY DURING MARATHON
Carries it 19 miles to finish line.
FLIGHT WAS SO BUMPY, PASSENGERS GOT A REFUND
110mph crosswinds.
STOLEN PENGUINS FOUND
No, not on the telly.
STOP PETTING THE WOMBAT
(Not a euphemism.)
CHINESE WORKERS MADE TO CRAWL IN STREET AS PUNISHMENT
For not meeting sales goals.