WOMAN INJURED WHILE SWIMMING WITH HUMPBACK WHALES
[Cetacean needed.]
AUDIO: WOMAN ATTACKED BY MUSKIE
Anybody seen the Kintner boy?
GROCERY STORE OWNER TRIED TO KILL CORONAVIRUS WITH FIRE
But not from space.
BRITISH MAN GROWING A NEW PENIS ON HIS ARM
Because the old one fell off, you see.
WOMAN ATTACKED WITH HAT FULL OF GLUE
Buckets of rain, hat full of glue
5G ON MOUNT EVEREST
Can’t talk now, Mom, it’s my turn to summit.
4-YEAR-OLD POET GETS PUBLISHING DEAL
And he wrote them all himself. Uh huh.
TOO MANY OVERWEIGHT TOURISTS FOR VENICE GONDOLIERS
We’re gonna need a bigger boat.