NOAH'S ARK EMPLOYEES MUST SIGN CHASTITY PLEDGE

Employees at an amusement park that has recreated Noah’s Ark is forcing unmarried employees to sign a chastity pledge. Single employees for Ken Ham’s new Ark Encounter theme park in Williamstown, Kentucky, must sign a statement promising not to engage in premarital sex. They must also sign a statement of faith, disavow homosexuality, same-sex marriage, and premarital sex. In addition, employees must affirm that they believe in Biblical creationism, and reject accepted scientific accounts on the age and origin of Earth and its inhabitants. Ark Encounter employees are expected to believe that God created the Earth in six days and six nights, and that dinosaurs, along with tigers and camels and other animals, roamed the Earth alongside Adam and Eve. The park has built an ark according to the dimensions given in the Bible – it’s 510 feet long, 85 feet wide, and 51 feet high. The park opens July 7.
* One other thing – no apples. For anybody. Period.
* You can’t tell me the employees won’t be breaking a couple of commandments after hours there.
* Do violators get fired, or stoned to death?
* I mean, you’re not supposed to pick and choose what parts of the Bible are right or wrong.
* Oh, yes, there will be a little Biblical cosplay action.
* I’m no religious scholar, but I don’t remember dinosaurs in the Bible.
* I know there’s the Book of Genesis, but I’ve never heard of the Book of Fred Flintstone.
* It’s an amusement park but it doesn’t sound like they’re easily amused.
* They call it an amusement park because an “ironclad belief system” park is too wordy.
* A chastity pledge? Wait, how can we repent if we don’t sin first?
* So they’re essentially searching for some very devout carnival barkers. Good luck with that.
* Even the Taliban think they should relax a little.