MAID OF HONOR GOES ON DRUNKEN RAMPAGE

David and Jennifer Butler got married in Port Charlotte, Florida. It was a lovely event, until the maid of honor chugged an entire bottle of Fireball whiskey. Maid of honor Amanda Willis started asking people for their keys. She managed to grab the best man’s keys out of his pocket, jumped in his car and took off with the best man hanging on through the window. He managed to pull the emergency brake. Guests wrestled Willis out of the car. She went back inside, grabbed a big bottle of Captain Morgan and guzzled it. Then she got violent, smacking one guest in the face. Police were called. Willis claimed to be having an asthma attack and started shaking as if she were having a seizure. They took her to a hospital, where she exposed herself to deputies, assaulted two medics and kicked over her bed pan. The bride and her maid of honor are no longer friends.
* I’m not an expert but it sounds like she may have a drinking problem.
* She likes Fireball whiskey and she’s quite the little fireball herself.
* You know that checklist to see if you’re an alcoholic? She aced it.
* Too bad she’s a “nasty drunk” instead of a “happy drunk”.
* The bride and her maid of honor are no longer friends. They’re not even drinking buddies.
* My Big Fat Alcoholic Wedding.
* Kicked over the bed pan? I guess golden showers really are a thing now.
* They left out a few minor things from the story because there just wasn’t time. For example, she also yelled “Take it off” during the first dance.
* Then she cut the wedding cake herself using a chainsaw.
* On the bright side, there was no projectile vomiting involved.
* I think we have the next Hangover sequel here.
* PHONE TOPIC: My wedding disaster.