CAR THIEVES PIMP OUT WOMAN'S CAR
It was recovered, and had a new racing stripe.
MAN STABS GIRLFRIEND IN BUTT WITH PITCHFORK
She pepper sprayed him.
MAN BANNED FROM FREE LIFETIME BUFFET COMMITS SUICIDE
Noble had won “free buffet for life”.
SCIENTOLOGIST TURNCOAT FRAMED BY ANONYMOUS TIP
A clear case of harassment by the church.
DOORMAN FIRED FOR BEING TOO NICE
He checked on pets, cleaned litter boxes, watered plants, held packages.
WOMAN FINDS 51 PEARLS IN HER FRIED OYSTERS
All from the same oyster.
GUY ACCIDENTALLY FIRES OFF GUN IN CHURCH
During Easter service.
ANOTHER WACKY NEWS STORY FROM FLORIDA: MAN KEPT ALLIGATOR IN SON'S BEDROOM
“I didn’t think it was a big deal because there’s millions of them.”
KIDS INVENT ICE CREAM FLAVORS
Mmmm…Gummy Wummy Surprise Sorbet.
THE BURGER-KING WEDDING
Joel Burger and Ashley King.