HERTZ SCREWS OVER CAR RENTERS
Canceled $300 orders, jacked them up to $3,000.
TEXAS WOMAN ASKS TO RESCHEDULE THE ECLIPSE
We’ll get right on that for you.
TACO BELL TESTING EXPLOSIVE BURRITO
The Firecracker Burrito.
CRUISE SHIP HAS WHALE CARCASS STUCK TO ITS BOW
That’s gonna leave a mark.
MANY STARBUCKS HAVE THREE OTHER STARBUCKS WITHIN A MILE
World domination is almost complete.
GYM BANS CABLE NEWS
Getting off the newscycle.
BURGLAR YELLS AT HOMEOWNER FOR SHOOTING AT HIM
That’s not how this works.
THE CHEETOS RESTAURANT
Fine, fine Cheetos dining.