THE ELECTION

Here are some jokes and thoughts you can share this morning. Please note that we are posting this before the final results are in!

* Donut or a Danish? Still too close to call this morning here at (Station Calls).
* Yay, the least worst candidate won.
* Well, this explains the popularity of Duck Dynasty, huh?
* The big winner last night? TV set designers. Those visuals were stunning.
* Never argue with a psychic goat. (The goat predicted a Trump win).
* (Trump wins) I hope this win doesn’t inflate Trump’s ego.
* (Trump wins) Donald Trump said his first job is going to be to build a wall between the US and Canada, to keep people in.
* (Trump wins) Regarding Hillary, to paraphrase Sally Field, “You hate me! You really, really hate me!”
* I hope Hillary got her deposit back on those fireworks.
* At least Alec Baldwin has a job for the next four years. (on SNL, imitating Trump)
* Did you notice all the network newspeople’s faces as they realized that they were part of the establishment being rejected by the American people? They all looked like… well, they all looked like Charlie Rose looks all the time.
* So what have we learned from this election? Nothing. The Democrats and Republicans still won’t work together.
* More states passed laws to legalize marijuana. Just in time, apparently.
* Colorado passed a Death with Dignity proposition, or as I call it, “Hot Diggity Death!”
* I hear there’s still a line outside Madonna’s house.
* Just think of how much Trump would have won by if the election wasn’t rigged.
* That Bill Clinton is incorrigible. Now he’s cruising the bars looking for pity sex.
* Bill’s got to be thinking, “Uh oh. Hillary’s going to be a real grouch the next few months.
* You know when we’re finally going to learn about Hillary’s health problems? At her sentencing. She’ll tell the judge, “You can’t put me in jail. I have serious health problems.”
* Did that seem forced? I’ve been sitting on that line for around a week.