ROBBER PEPPER SPRAYS HIMSELF
He sprayed it, then walked into the cloud.
RESTAURANT HOLDS WHITE APPRECIATION DAY
“The least we could do is offer one day to appreciate white Americans.”
MAN ASSAULTED BY GIRLFRIEND WHO WANTED SEX IN THE MEN'S ROOM
She followed him inside and began stripping off her clothes.
GUY PLANS TO RUN ACROSS THE COUNTRY LIKE FORREST GUMP
Oudersluys says that “Forrest Gump” is his favorite movie.
MCDONALD'S TO TEST OUT KALE
Mmm…trendy.
WOMAN SUING ALL GAYS, EVERYWHERE
A seven-page, handwritten petition delivered to the U.S. District Court.
COP BITES MAN IN TESTICLES DURING FIGHT
The victim accused Flaig of groping his female roommate.
WOMAN HELD HOSTAGE TEXTS FOR HELP WITH PIZZA ORDER
She wanted a pepperoni pizza and police.
NEW HOMEOWNER FINDS PORN HIDDEN IN CEILING
“Bought a house. Found this while taking out ceiling tiles. Jackpot.”
WOMAN SPREADS CONTAMINATED POO ON CO-WORKER'S CHAIR, COMPUTER MOUSE
They worked in a lab testing poo for germs.