OHIO WANTS TO BRING BACK FITNESS TEST FOR STUDENTS
Go, you chicken fat, go.
MAN IN CAPE AND UNDERWEAR STEALS WOMEN’S UNDERPANTS
Captain Underpants strikes again.
CAR CRASH DRIVER TAKES OFF WITH COP INSIDE THE CAR
You see me sitting next to you, right?
FUNERAL LIMOUSINE HIT BY TRAIN
Thanks, we’ll just walk from here.
FLORIDA’S PYTHON-KILLING PROGRAM IS WORKING
20 tons of snakes.
MAN RELEASES RACCOON INTO BUSINESS
Only to find Gideon’s bible.
TWO RESCUED FROM DEADMAN’S POINT
Or, rather, Not-Yet-Deadman’s Point.
FLORIDA MAN STABS SHARK IN HEAD FOR STEALING HIS FISH
Go catch your own fish, Sharko.
BEAR BREAKS INTO NURSING HOME
Hide the porridge!
CAVIAR POACHERS POPPED
Something fishy.