FLORIDA MAN YELLS “PSYCH!”, SPEEDS AWAY FROM COP
Promptly hits a truck.
PEACOCK THEFT
Who’s the dirty bird doing this?
THE TESLA DINER OPENS
The future of eating.
JOEY CHESTNUT WINS HOT DOG EATING CONTEST
Hot diggety dog!
THE BEEF TONGUE BANDIT
Someone’s having a party!
FIREWORKS DELIVERED TO WRONG TOWN
And the rockets red gla—-oh, never mind.
SPACE WEED DESTROYED IN CRASH
Pot shot.
CLOWN-MASKED BURGLAR KID RECOGNIZED BY HIS PARENTS
That’s my boy!
MAN STUCK IN CHIMNEY TRYING TO RESCUE DOG IN BATHROOM
Santa’s comin’ for ya, buddy!