THE KETCHUP SMOOTHIE
It sure doesn’t taste like tomato juice.
COLORADO SEWER BEARS
Bearry Manholilow, everybody!
GUY WINS 389 JACKPOTS AT CASINO IN ONE DAY
Just like everybody!
MAN’S PLANE STOLEN TWICE IN ONE WEEK
Plane crazy.
TWO STABBED OVER 4-YEAR-OLD EGGPLANT SANDWICH
As sure as eggs is eggs.
CLASS ACTION LAWSUIT OVER FROOT LOOPS
A part of this deceitful breakfast.
HIGHWAY HOT DOG SPILL
The driver was doggin’ it.
PENNSYLVANIA TOWN STINKS
Is the odor a) Pet food; b) Waste; c) Manure; d) Sewage?
DEALER REPOS CAR; CAR OWNER TAKES AWAY CAR DEALER’S NAME
Take the car. What recourse does she possibly have?