WASHINGTON MONUMENT CLOSED FOR ELEVATOR REPAIR
Indefinitely.
TEACHER BEATS UP STUDENT WHO OWED HIM WEED MONEY
Police pop Mr. Pope.
KENTUCKY KLOWN KAPTURED!
Arrested for lurking with a mask.
AT LEAST YOU DON'T HAVE BATHROOM FROGS
Like they do in Florida.
UPSET WOMAN FLASHES STORE CLERK
Over a $5 charge.
TARGET SCRAPS 'KID SHOPPING CARTS'
Immediate complaints.
DIAPER THIEF ARRESTED
$700 worth of diapers.
USC HAS OFFICIAL THERAPY DOG
Professor Beauregard Tirebiter
WOMAN STABBED BY HER DOG
“She’ll kill you with kindness.”
TEXAS WOMAN DELIVERS 3RD SET OF NATURALLY-CONCEIVED TWINS
“Twins, twins, twins.”