VICTORIA'S SECRET: (SHHH – NO ONE'S BUYING ANYTHING)
The news is not uplifting.
AUDIO: DWI GIRL CARTWHEELS HER WAY INTO THE HOOSEGOW
If i were drunk, could I do this?
AUDIO: SCHOOL WILL TEACH YOU HOW TO BE AN ADULT
When your parents have failed you completely.
MAN HITS HIS MOM WITH A PORK CHOP
And then headbutted her.
NASA ANNOUNCES NEARBY STAR HAS SEVEN PLANETS
At least three could have water.
CARETAKER FIRED OVER SEXY DANCE FOR 100-YEAR-OLD MAN
Who had dementia.
GUY GRADES EX-GIRLFRIEND'S APOLOGY LETTER LIKE IS WAS AN ESSAY
She got a D minus.
NASA SCIENTISTS WANT TO MAKE PLUTO A PLANET AGAIN
Make up your damn minds.
10-YEAR-OLD ASKS COPS FOR HELP WITH MATH HOMEWORK
And gets one wrong.