HEMORRHOIDAL WIPES RECALLED
Fondly.
8 YEAR-OLD BOY IS THE BILLIONTH VISITOR AT DISNEYLAND***
***Not ACTUALLY the billionth visitor.
CANDY MAN CALLS POLICE ON HIMSELF
Since when is an old man offering kids candy considered suspicious?
MAN HAS CAR STOLEN WHILE HE’S BURGLARIZING STORE
No honor among thieves.
MAN WAKES UP TO A HOTEL ROOM FULL OF BATS
And not Louisville Sluggers.
NATHAN’S – YAWN – HOT DOG EATING CONTEST. MEH.
Pass the mustard.
“IT’S A SMALL WORLD” BURNS, BUT NOT ENOUGH
Better luck next time.
BURGLARY SUSPECT CAUGHT HIDING UNDER A PATROL CAR
Thought you could outwit a Tulsa cop, did you?
CLIMBERS CLIMB EMPIRE STATE BUILDING ANTENNA
The power of love is a curious thing.
YU-GI-OH TOURNAMENT POSTPONED ON ACCOUNT OF PERSONAL HYGIENE
Something rotten’s going on.