4-YEAR-OLD POET GETS PUBLISHING DEAL
And he wrote them all himself. Uh huh.
TOO MANY OVERWEIGHT TOURISTS FOR VENICE GONDOLIERS
We’re gonna need a bigger boat.
AUDIO: BRITISH COUPLE NAMES THEIR SON LUCIFER
The hell you say.
AUDIO: WATER PARK TAINTED WITH BEAR SPRAY
And where’s the fun in that?
TRUCK FULL OF COVID-19 HIJACKED IN SOUTH AFRICA
Step 3: profit.
JOHN WICK MOVIE LEADS TO COCAINE BUST
Name on the package was movie villain.
AUDIO: SHARK GRABS BOY FROM BOAT
Pulled. Him. Off. The. Boat.
COLLEGE STUDENT RIDES BIKE HOME, FROM SCOTLAND TO GREECE
Took a month and a half.