ZOO TO GIVE ELEPHANTS MEDICAL MARIJUANA
And hamsters turn on frequently.
NINJA MUSEUM ROBBED
No one saw a thing.
TODDLER HAS NINE ORDERS OF MCDONALD’S FRIES DELIVERED
No potato famine in this family.
POLICE OFFICER LOCKED IN HIS OWN HANDCUFFS
What’s all this then?
CHOCOLATE FACTORY SPRAYS COCOA POWDER OVER TOWN
Covered in Lindt.
WOMAN SAW JESUS’ FACE ON A POTATO
And she ate Him, and it was good.
HUMANS HAVE BEEN USING BEDS FOR 200,000 YEARS
Grass mat on a bed of ashes.
BOY HAD LEGO UP HIS NOSE FOR TWO YEARS
It’s not news.
FISHERMAN KILLED BY FLYING MACKEREL
Totally fish of the heart.