SCIENTISTS POTTY TRAIN COWS
Too late for the IgNobel Prizes!
BISHOP QUITS CHURCH FOR LOVE OF SATANIC EROTICA WRITER
Talk about banging the bishop.
MAN CRUSHES SELF AT MCDONALD’S DRIVE-THRU
He deserved some brakes today.
BOY’S COMMUNION MONEY FLOATS OFF WITH HELIUM BALLOON
Tied to the string.
LARGE GROUP OF PADDLE-BOARDERS NEEDED RESCUING
C’mon, it’ll be easy.
AFGHANISTAN GETS NEW NAME
Opression McOppressionface?
AUDIO: RIPPER, THE TALKING MUSK DUCK
How does it make the “f” sound with that bill?
3-YEAR-OLD MISSING AUSTRALIAN BOY FOUND
It’s a Labor Day miracle.
KOSOVO MAN SWALLOWS CELL PHONE
What’s the area code for the esophagus?
QUEEN’S DEATH PLANS LEAKED
Or, when London Bridge falls down.