GRANNY SWALLOWED BY PYTHON
Wakey, wakey, here comes snakey.
DIRTIEST MAN IN THE WORLD DIES
10-foot pole sales plummet.
DJ DIES MID-SHOW
Doing what he loved. AND IT WASN’T VOICE TRACKING.
MAN CREATES CALENDAR FEATURING UK PARKING LOTS
It’s bloody dull, innit?
VENICE GONDOLA STOLEN
That’s a paddlin’.
AUDIO: SANTA’S GRAVE DISCOVERED IN TURKEY
A nightmare before Christmas.
COFFIN MAKERS GOING ON STRIKE
Management ain’t coffin’ up a raise.
BRITISH MAN JAILED FOR CARRYING SHARPIES
They mean business in England.