DIRTIEST MAN IN THE WORLD DIES

An Iranian man nicknamed the “dirtiest man in the world” for not taking a shower for decades has died at the age of 94. Amou Haji, who did not wash for more than half a century and was single (* There’s a shocker.), died on Sunday in the southern village of Dejgah. A short documentary film titled “The Strange Life of Amou Haji” was made about his life in 2013. Haji had avoided showering over fears of “getting sick.” But for the first time a few months ago, villagers had taken him to a bathroom to wash.
* See?
* So basically, they’ll just be burying a human-sized crust.
* At least they don’t have to bury him. They’re just going to lay him on the ground and let him blend in.
* Truly, he’s taking a Dirt Nap.
* Who handled the arrangements? Mike Rowe?
* I thought the Dirtiest Man in the World was Sarah Silverman.