VERMONT WILL PAY YOU TO LIVE THERE
(Some restrictions apply)
MAN MOONS JUDGE, IS JAILED FOR CONTEMPT
Knight of the full moon.
HAWAII: VACATION PARADISE (NEVER MIND THE YOU-KNOW-WHAT)
Tourist bookings are down. Go figure.
WOMAN TRIES TO REMOVE BOYFRIEND'S TESTICLES
Unsuccesfully.
MEAT-SCENTED CANDLES
For Dad.
IHOP WON'T SERVE ARMLESS BOY WHO EATS WITH HIS FEET
Rooty-tooty fresh ‘n footie.
CHURCH VANDAL ATE THREE FROZEN PIZZAS AND ICE CREAM
It’s not deliverance, it’s Digiorno.
TODAY, STARBUCKS WILL BE CLOSING FOR SENSITIVITY TRAINING
A four hour coffee break.
HELP WANTED: CANDY INTERN
Eat candy for the summer.