MODERN-DAY CATTLE RUSTLING
Much easier than it used to be.
LEAF BLOWER MISTAKEN FOR BAZOOKA
Easy mistake to make.
FASTEST PIZZA MAKER CROWNED
Take that, A.I.
PEOPLE SPOTTED COMING OUT OF NEW YORK SEWERS
We all float down here.
GOOGLE TO RELEASE 32 MILLION MOSQUITOS, MAYBE
No way any of this can go wrong.
ROLLER COASTER RIDER BANNED FROM SIX FLAGS FOR LIFE
Coasters are for screaming, not eating.
AUDIO: THE ORGY DOME NEEDS YOUR HELP
Please give.