GENERATOR THIEVES THWARTED BY ROOFERS WITH NAIL GUNS
A hail of nail fire.
MYSTERY WYOMING WIENER WINGING
Frankly, this is ridiculous.
SUSPECT IN GHILLIE SUIT HIDES FROM COPS
Fade into the woodwork.
CAKE DECORATION GONE WRONG, LITERALLY
You asked for it.
MOST RAT-INFESTED CITIES OF 2026
Rat-a-tat-tat.
POLITICIAN FINALLY SETTLES DONUT BILL, SIX YEARS LATER
Another jelly-filled politician.
AUDIO: NEW JERSEY MAN WINS SASQUATCH CALLING COMPETITION
Yep, that’s a Bigfoot.
CLAM RUSTLERS
They were being shellfish.
GUITAR CENTER TO ALLOW “STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN”
I’d go with The Immigrant Song. There’s only two notes.
POLICE OFFICER BITES BOYFRIEND WHO WANTED TO BREAK UP
She likes it McGruff.