TEACHER RESIGNS OVER JOKE MESSAGE THAT HE WOULD KILL CHILDREN IF THEY DIDN'T READ SILENTLY
They always fire the cool teachers.
SERIAL BURGLAR WEARS SANTA HAT
He’s a mean one.
CHUNK OF AIRPLANE ICE CRASHES THROUGH ROOF, LANDS ON BED
Not bathroom ice, not this time, anyway.
BABYSITTER USES KID TO HELP PULL OFF A BURGLARY
Wasn’t this the plot of “Oliver Twist”?
DUI SUSPECT SAYS HIS NAME IS "BURGER KING"
With cheese?
AUDIO: KRISPY KREME BEER
Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?
FRIED CHICKEN-LOVING ROBBER RETURNS TO SCENE OF THE CRIME
“Our food is so good…”
MYSTERY OREO FLAVOR ANNOUNCED: FRUITY PEBBLES
If you guessed Froot Loops – (BUZZ) wrong!