WOMAN CONVICTED OF MURDER WITH PARROT TESTIMONY

A jury has convicted a Michigan woman of first-degree murder in the shooting death of her husband in a crime apparently witnessed by the man’s pet parrot. 49-year-old Glenna Duram was found guilty Wednesday of killing 46-year-old Martin Duram. He was shot five times in May 2015. Glenna Duram suffered a head wound in what prosecutors said was a suicide attempt, but survived. After his death, Martin Duram’s ex-wife, Christina Keller, took possession of the couple’s pet parrot, Bud, and testified that Bud kept repeating “don’t (BLEEPING) shoot” in Martin Duram’s voice.
* Actually, Bud said: “Don’t (BLEEPING) shoot! BANG! Don’t (BLEEPING) shoot! BANG! BANG! BANG! Don’t – BANG!”
* Turns out the parrot was bribed by the dog, who was mad that Martin didn’t take him out more often.
* Stool pigeon.
* Who’s in the big cage now, sister?
* Bud is currently in a witness protection program in the flamingo pen at the San Diego Zoo.
* Polly want parole?