WOMAN BEAT UP HUSBAND WHO WOULDN'T STOP FARTING

A Port St. Lucie, Florida, woman was arrested for assaulting her husband when he couldn’t stop passing gas. Donald Fitzroy Meikle told police his wife, Dawn, elbowed him on the arm when he passed gas in bed. This happened early in the morning on December 11. Meikle said she eventually kicked him out of bed because his flatulence wouldn’t stop. Mrs. Fitzroy eventually let him back into bed, but he passed gas again, and she started to kick and elbow him again. Meikle said he held his wife for his own safety. During the struggle, she suffered a broken lip and he suffered several scratches across his chest. Mrs. Fitzroy eventually called 911. Police said she also sprayed pepper spray to keep her husband out of the bathroom. Police arrested her for domestic battery.
* And farting like a volcano isn’t domestic battery?
* This explains the haze in Port St. Lucie.
* Hello? It’s called “Beano”!
* Marriage. It’s a gas!
* I swear when I saw the headline here my first thought was “Florida. I bet it happened in Florida.”
* It’s got nothing to do with more gas in Florida – it’s got everything to do with more wacky news in Florida.
* The woman suffered a broken lip and a hurt nose. Actually, the hurt on her nose was from the farting.
* The farting was so bad the woman sprayed pepper spray just for the fresh air.
* What do you say we get him to rip off another one at the trial?