WEDNESDAY, July 3 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, July 3, 2024
(Print button is at bottom of post. To print with larger type, cut and paste content into a document, and print that document.)

NOTE: MORNING SIDEKICK WILL BE OFF ON THURSDAY, JULY 4, AND FRIDAY, JULY 5, FOR THE U.S. INDEPENDENCE DAY HOLIDAY. WE WILL RETURN WITH PREP FOR MONDAY, JULY 8.
Check our website prep page for items we find and post over the break.

COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – 4th of July

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

INTERNATIONAL PLASTIC BAG FREE DAY

NATIONAL CHOCOLATE WAFER DAY

NATIONAL EAT BEANS DAY

NATIONAL STAY OUT OF THE SUN DAY
The Days of the Year website says this:
“This day is about giving our skin a break from the sweltering heat. If you simply cannot resist going outside, then you can always find a nice bit of shade, yet make sure you wear sunscreen and make an extra effort to protect your skin.”

July is:

Adopt a Rescued Rabbit Month
Air Conditioning Appreciation Month
Baked Bean Month
Cell Phone Courtesy Month
Family Reunion Month
International Blondie and Deborah Harry Month
National Blueberries Month
National Grilling Month
National Hot Dog Month
National Ice Cream Month
Melon Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

WHAT TO WATCH – New and Returning Shows and Movies
Premiering Thursday and Friday (There were no items for Saturday or Sunday)
Listings sourced from the TV Guide and EW websites

THURSDAY, July 4

“Land of Tanabata”
Hulu – New Live-Action Series based on the manga comic
Synopsis: Yôji Minamimaru, nicknamed Nanmaru, is a college student who has the supernatural ability that allows him to “create small holes in anything.” When he finds his professor missing, he must confront a crisis threatening the entire world with this seemingly useless ability.

Season Premieres:
Netflix – “Barbecue Showdown”
Netflix – “Rhythm + Flow France”

FRIDAY, July 5

“Down in the Valley”
Starz – New Docuseries
Synopsis: Takes viewers on a tantalizing tour of the Deep South, unveiling a complex South that is equal parts poignant, joyful, and magical.

“The Imaginary”
Netflix – New Animated Film
Synopsis: Amanda and her imaginary friend Rudger go on thrilling make-believe adventures. But when Rudger finds himself alone, he faces a mysterious threat.

THE BUZZ

FUNNY FIREWORK NAMES

There’s no greater joy to a child on the 4th of July than the thrill of setting off dangerous-sounding fireworks. These are actual names of fireworks found for sale online:
– Psycho-delic
– Doctor Boom
– Eternal Eruption
– Mount Magma
– Silent Insanity
– Badassical Blast
– Raging Rottweilers
– Aqua Boom
– Moonshine Mother
– Loud Cloud
– Moon Jellies
– Whistling Kitty Chaser
– Purple People Eater
– L’il Bubba
– Da L’il Yooper
– Medusa’s Rage
– Lawbreaker
– 177-Degree Sunburn

And then there’s this: There are ‘Marijuana-Themed Fireworks’ for sale. This is a real thing:
– Hemp Hemp Hooray
– Speedlimit 420
– Cronic Boom
– Munchies
– Puff Puff Boom
* Boy, imagine the smoke cloud at the end of that big finale.
* The pot fireworks must get higher than regular fireworks.
* Be sure to write your initials and phone number on all of your fingers with a magic marker. It makes them easier to identify later.
* Sadly, our pet dogs don’t find any of this amusing.

THINGS AMERICA DOES RIGHT, ACCORDING TO FOREIGNERS

(Note: In keeping with celebrating America over the 4th of July, here’s another look at a story we brought you in 2020.)
Buzzfeed asked non-Americans to list some things that America does right. Here are some of the responses:
– “How accommodating many places are to disabled people, especially for people in wheelchairs. There are often ramps and large disabled parking spaces, not to mention that there is an entire amusement park for people in wheelchairs in San Antonio!”
– “You guys invest a lot in entertainment. The shows in my country suck.”
– “Big living spaces. I live in Hong Kong and our average flat sizes are around 300 to 500 square feet.”
– “People there are really nice and talkative. Was a bit confused by you guys saying ‘How are you?’ as a greeting, though. I knew you did this, but still, it caught me off guard.”
– “They make a lot of great music. I’m sort of a metalhead and my country doesn’t have any rock bands.”
– “You can right turn on red lights.”
– “On my travels in America, I found the majority of Americans to be kind, keen to help, and lovely to spend time with.”
– “Safety in rural areas. Our dream is to buy a farm and live peacefully, but where I live, it’s so dangerous it’s unreal.”
– “Free refills at restaurants.”
– “The country has everything! You want mountains, you got it! You want forest, you got it! You want beaches, you got it! You want huge cities, you got it! In Europe, you have to go from country to country to achieve this.”
– “Zip codes have only numbers — easier to remember than postal codes. And all telephone numbers throughout the country have exactly the same number of digits.”
– “I spent a week going through the Smithsonian in Washington and it was amazing.”
– “NASA.”
* Hello? Do none of these people admire our staggering selection of crunchy snacks?
* And no one even mentioned The Cheesecake Factory. Is there a better symbol of America than a place that serves you too much food, and then makes it all but impossible for you to turn down cheesecake?
* Right turn on red really sums up America: Innovation, freedom and caring about your fellow man all rolled up into one.

WHAT DEMOCRATS AND REPUBLICANS ACTUALLY AGREE ON

GWI USA, a consumer trends data firm, polled Americans about what they liked, hated, their habits and their various other preferences. They broke the polling down into Democrats and Republicans. They found a handful of things that people on both sides agree that they like, equally. In other words, the same percentage of Republicans and Democrats like “eating popcorn.” So, here are some of those things we all agree on. Let’s try getting along by starting from here:
– Eating popcorn
– Always try to see the good in people
– Amazon is their favorite retailer
– Interested in cooking
– Interested in travel
– Check the phone first thing waking up and last thing before bed
– Enjoy documentaries
– Don’t trust big corporations
– Buy toys for our pets
– Eating pancakes or waffles for breakfast
– Worry about A.I.
– Like Lindt chocolate
* They like Lindt chocolate? Oh my god, both sides are nuts.
* How do you simultaneously don’t trust big corporations and love Amazon?
* Members of both parties agree on always trying to see the good in people. Unless the people are candidates for public office.
* Good to see this GWI USA company really digging into the issues.
* I think both parties can agree that this is a dumb survey.

U.S. NEWS

FLORIDA WOMAN ARRESTED OVER CUDDLE KERFLUFFLE

In Seminole, Florida, a woman was arrested for domestic battery after attacking her boyfriend because he didn’t want to cuddle with her. Investigators say Jillian Uygun, 22, argued with her boyfriend Saturday night regarding over his disinterest in physical intimacy. The dispute reignited Sunday morning as Uygun “continually tried to ‘cuddle’ with the victim.” Uygun allegedly escalated the dispute into a physical confrontation, grabbing the victim’s chest hair, scratching his face, biting him on the forehead, and breaking his — his phone. After being read her rights, Uygun reportedly admitted that she “continued to touch victim multiple times after being repeatedly told to stop.” She characterized the touching as “cuddling.”
* She gots to have it.
* ♬ ♩ “You say ‘to-MAY-to,’ I say ‘to-MAH-to;’ you say ‘cuddling,’ I say ‘assault and battery’…” ♫ ♪
* How do you bite someone on the forehead? Unless maybe he’s Megamind.
* In defense of the boyfriend, it’s summer in Florida. It’s hot, it’s sticky, no one wants to touch anything this time of year.
* She needs a nickname: The Hugger Mugger Bandit.

UNIVERSITY EMPLOYEE PAID FOR TWO YEARS, NEVER SHOWED UP FOR WORK

A new audit at Utah State University Eastern in Price, Utah, has found that three administrators were aware that there was an employee who failed to show up to work for two years – but was still being paid. The employee, Warren Agner, was friends with the administrators – in fact, he was living with one of them. Agner’s job was overseeing the school’s Custom Fit and Small Business Development Center programs. He was supposed to interact with struggling local businesses, providing money and support for them. He never showed up and never distributed funds they sorely needed. The university staffers all covered for Agner so he could keep getting a paycheck. Over the two year period, from 2021 to 2023, Agner was paid $157,000 in salary and benefits.
* Obviously there is no School of Business Ethics at Utah State University Eastern.
* This guy is a real good-for-nothing.
* He ought to at least go into the office to deal with the 18,000 messages in his inbox.
* This is kinda like the college nightmare in reverse: you suddenly realize you haven’t gone to school all year. But instead of panicking, they give you a reward.
* Not showing up and still getting paid. I would posit that Warren Agner is a hero and a role model for today’s young people everywhere.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

CHINESE WOMAN USED HAND GRENADE AS A HAMMER FOR YEARS

A 90-year-old Chinese woman unknowingly used an old hand grenade to crack nuts and hammer nails for two decades after finding the unexploded ordinance in a field one day. The woman said she found the “strange tool” – a wooden handle with a lump of hard metal at one end. The Chinese grenade does, in fact, resemble a mallet. Over the years she used it to pound all kinds of tough objects, from nuts to metal nails. It was only last week when a team of men demolishing her old house noticed the hand grenade, and saw that the metallic head was full of dents. They told her she had been gambling with her life every time she used it.
* Yes, it very nearly was kung-POW chicken.
* “Wow!” she used to say every time she used the grenade. “This hammer is da bomb!”
* Longest game of Russian Roulette ever.
* So did they end up using the grenade to speed along her house demolition?
* What do you suppose her fortune cookie read the day before she found it?

TRENDING

“STRANGER THINGS” SEASON FIVE WILL BE VERY LONG

Actress Maya Hawke, who plays Robin on the Netflix hit “Stranger Things” says Season 5 will be eight “very long” episodes. Interviewed on the June 27 episode of the “Podcrushed” podcast, Hawke said, “We’re making basically eight movies. The episodes are very long.” Season 5 is expected to debut in 2025.

ANN WILSON OF HEART HAS CANCER

Ann Wilson, lead singer of rock band Heart, says she has cancer and the band is postponing the remaining shows on its Royal Flush Tour while she undergoes treatment. Wilson said in a statement Tuesday that she underwent a surgery to remove a cancerous growth and is recovering steadily, but that her doctors urged her to undergo preventive chemotherapy and take time off from performing “in order to fully recover.” She says, “Please know that I absolutely plan to be back on stage in 2025. My team is getting those details sorted & we’ll let you know the plan as soon as we can.”

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

TOMORROW – U.S. Independence Day
Sept. 2, Monday – Labor Day
Sept. 11, Wednesday – Patriot Day
Sept. 23, Sunday – Fall begins (Autumn Equinox is 8:44 a.m. EDT)

BIRTHDAYS

Yeardley Smith (voice of Lisa Simpson) … 60
Tom Cruise (actor) … 62
Montel Williams (TV talk show host, pitchman) … 68

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“Talk is over-rated as a means of settling disputes.”

(A) Vladimir Putin
(B) The Hulk
(C) Tom Cruise

ANSWER: (C) Tom Cruise

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2009 – Sarah Palin announced she would resign as Alaska governor with 16 months left in her term.
* The thought of staying left her cold.

2005 – A NASA space probe, Deep Impact, hit its comet target as planned in a mission to learn how the solar system formed.
* Plus, guys just like to crash things into other things.

1997 – In his first formal response to charges by Paula Jones of sexual harassment, President Bill Clinton denied all allegations in her lawsuit, and asked a judge to dismiss the case.
* He eventually gave her $850,000. Oh, not because he was guilty – because he’s such a swell guy!

1928 – The first television went on sale in the United States.
* In those days, the TV ratings battle were easy to work out. You just called the family who had the TV and asked them what they were watching.

1928 – The world’s first successful color TV transmission was accomplished by Jone Logie Baird in London.
* Sure, the same day black-and-white sets went on sale in the U.S. (see previous item), making them instantly obsolete.

1886 – In Germany, Karl Benz, of Mercedes-Benz fame, drove his 1st automobile.
* He parked it for a few minutes and when he came back, the hood ornament was gone.

1819 – The first savings bank opened, in New York City.
* Unfortunately, their kick-off promotion of giving away a toaster with each new account didn’t work so well, since sliced bread wasn’t invented ’til forty years later.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2021 – Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton married at Shelton’s ranch in Oklahoma. They met in 2014 when they were judges on the TV show “The Voice” and started dating a year later.

2012 – KISS announced that they would release a guitar-size book containing unseen photographs from their 40-year career. The limited edition called Monster would have a $4,299 price tag and at 3 feet tall, 2.5 feet wide, and was reported to be the largest music book ever published.

2004 – David Crosby was fined $5,000 by a U.S. court after admitting attempted criminal possession of a weapon. It followed his arrest in New York in March when a gun, knife and marijuana were found in his luggage.

2002 – The wife of Ozzy Osbourne, Sharon Osbourne, underwent an emergency operation after being diagnosed with cancer. The family had become cult heroes after the success of the MTV “The Osbournes Show”.

2002 – Three diners at a newly opened Britney Spears-owned restaurant suffered food poisoning. The three students who had eaten wild striped bass at the New York restaurant made official complaints and vowed never to eat they’re again.

1971 – Singer Jim Morrison of The Doors died in Paris at age 27.

1969 – In the U.K., the body of Rolling Stones guitarist Brian Jones was recovered from his swimming pool. He drowned after a party.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. 8% of people surveyed say they do THIS to much. What is it?
Swearing

2. Almost all of us have worn THIS item, but less than 10% have purchased it. What is it?
Bowling shoes

3. Almost 60% of people surveyed say they would never break THIS rule. What is it?
Use the supermarket express check-out lane with too many items

(c) 2024
MORNING SIDEKICK RADIO SHOW PREP & COMEDY
8062 West Massey Circle
Littleton, CO 80128
USA
morningsidekick(at)gmail(dot)(com)
Tel: 303-727-9111