TEXAS STATE FAIR FOOD WINNERS (?)

The winners of the State Fair of Texas’ annual food competition have been announced.
– Fried Jell-O, created by Ruth Hauntz, took the Big Tex Choice Award for Best Taste. “A classic cherry-flavored Jell-O in a panko-crusted breading is flash-fried to perfection and then dusted with powdered sugar. Prepared with a tasty topping of whipped cream and a cherry garnish, this dish has the perfect amount of crunch to compliment the jiggle.”
– Cookie Fries, by Isaac Russo took the coveted award of Most Creative. “The cookie fry may look like it needs ketchup, but don’t be fooled by the classic crinkle-cut appearance. Offered in traditional cookie flavors like chocolate chip or sprinkles, these sweet treats are served with your choice of the accompanying strawberry or milk chocolate sauce.”
* I would hate to see the losers.
* So that’s what’s been wrong with Jell-O all these years. Not crunchy enough.
* Have you got anything without the word “fried” in it?
* See, the problem with Cookie Fries is that they waited too long to introduce the fried concept.
* If they had named it Fried Cookies they might have won.
* Although in this contest there are no real winners.
* I don’t like the phrase “flash-fried.” It sounds too much like a war crime.
* What happens when you eat these is interesting. You can actually hear your digestive system crying.
* I’m curious – just how huge are the asses on the people who come up with these?