ROOMMATE ATTACKED FOR TAKING TOO LONG IN THE BATHROOM

A Jersey City, New Jersey man punched his roommate and threw him into a glass mirror because he was taking too long in the bathroom. The victim told police that the man yelled at him through a closed door to get out because he wanted to use the bathroom at 2 AM Saturday morning. The 32-year-old alleged assailant was charged with simple assault and domestic violence.
* In his defense, it was only two days after Thanksgiving dinner.
* Usually, those 2AM bathroom backups only happen after you’ve passed the age of 50.
* You move out of your parents’ house and you think, “Finally, I can spend as long in the bathroom as I want.” Uhn-uh.
* Yup, it’s official. The holiday stories are here.
* Oh, this could happen anytime of year, but the stories spike from now ’til Christmas.
* Then we drift into the always-eventful “It’s New Year’s Day and I just screwed up my whole life” stories.
* He threw his roommate into a glass mirror, giving them both time to reflect on their troubled friendship.