MONDAY, Aug 12 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR MONDAY, August 12, 2024
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TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

IBM PC DAY
Wired magazine says this:
“On August 12, 1981, IBM introduced its 5150 personal computer. It swept away the competition and effectively had the market to itself, until the original Apple Macintosh appeared two-and-a-half years later. For its operating system, IBM went to a small company called Microsoft. The success of the IBM 5150 established the dominance of the Microsoft operating system.”

INTERNATIONAL YOUTH DAY

JULIENNE FRIES DAY

MIDDLE CHILD’S DAY

NATIONAL SEWING MACHINE DAY

VINYL RECORD DAY

WORLD ELEPHANT DAY

August is:

Black Business Month
Family Fun Month
International Peace Month
National Back to School Month
National Catfish Month
National Crayon Collection Month
National Goat Cheese Month
National Golf Month
National Panini Month
National Peach Month
National Sandwich Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

WHAT TO WATCH – New and Returning Shows and Movies
Premiering Monday through Wednesday
Listings sourced from the TV Guide and EW websites

MONDAY, August 12

Season Premiere:
Hulu – “Solar Opposites”

WEDNESDAY, August 14

“Bad Monkey”
Apple TV+ – New Series
Synopsis: A former Miami Police Department member turned health inspector, Andrew Yancy, investigates a case involving a human arm; he navigates through eccentric characters and unexpected challenges, all while dealing with his own personal struggles. Starring Vince Vaughn.

“Daughters”
Netflix – New Documentary
Synopsis: Four girls prepare to reunite with their imprisoned fathers through a special dance at a DC jail in this moving documentary about the healing power of love.

“Rhythm Masters: A Mickey Hart Experience”
ESPN – New Documentary
Synopsis: Mickey Hart, Grateful Dead and Dead & Company drummer, takes viers on a sonic journey to create an original score inspired by conversations with icons and celebrated voices from the sports sphere.

“Worst Ex Ever”
Netflix – New True-Crime Docuseries
Synopsis: From chilling betrayals to murder plots, this true-crime docuseries dissects the dark side of love through eyewitness testimonies.

Season Premiere:
MTV – “The Challenge”

THE BUZZ

THE BEST BEHAVED DOGS

Which dog breeds are the best behaved? A survey of 5,000 American dog owners, commissioned by Forbes Advisor, ranks the behavior of the 25 most popular breeds recognized by the American Kennel Club. The behaviors are based on barking, jumping on people, following commands, begging for food, destroying things and trying to escape.
The Best Behaved Dogs
1. Labrador Retriever
2. Rottweiler
3. Shih Tzu
4. Cane Corso
5. Golden Retriever
6. German Shepherd
7. Boston Terrier
8. Poodle
9. Yorkshire Terrier
10 American Bulldog.

Worst Behaved Dogs:
5. Cavalier King Charles Spaniel
4. French Bulldog
3. Havanese
2. Beagle
1. Siberian Husky

U.S. NEWS

ATTORNEY CAUGHT SMUGGLING CIGS, POT, PAPERS, PHONES, SCALES

A Mississippi attorney was arrested for smuggling contraband into prison. Daniel Sidney Dale allegedly had a scheme where he would pose as legal counsel for detainees for whom he would sneak in contraband. While visiting inmates at the Hinds County prison last Thursday, Dale was caught with a briefcase full of marijuana, dozens of cigarettes, rolling papers, tobacco products, scales and two cellphones, each with charging cords and plugs.
* At least it was all in his briefcase, is all I’m sayin’.
* What a dope.
* I’m guessing the security at Mississippi prisons can be a little lax.
* They’re gonna have to build an annex onto the evidence locker.
* Even Saul Goodman thought this was skanky.

WOMAN ARRESTED FOR SHARING APPLEBEE’S ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT APPETIZER

Back on August 2nd in Portage, Indiana, an Applebee’s customer was arrested for sharing her “All-You-Can-Eat Appetizer” with friends at her table. Shawneesha Cobbs, 28, let her friends dig in to the appetizer she ordered. When the bill came, there were individual appetizer charges of $16 for every person at the table. An argument ensued, with Cobbs saying that she thought “all-you-can-eat” meant everyone in your group and claimed that the menu didn’t specifically say it was “per person.” The server brought over a menu and pointed out the “Per Person” in bold lettering under “All You Can Eat.” Police were called after Cobbs and her friends refused to cooperate and pay the bill. Police say she was acting “disorderly” and refused to heed their commands, and arrested her. One of her friends ending up paying the entirety of the bill.
* Something tells me there was no tip.
* First time dining out, honey?
* Imagine the light bulb going off in her head: “Ha! I’ve discovered a fatal flaw in their meal plan!”
* From now on, everyone ordering the “All-You-Can-Eat Appetizer” should be seated alone at a separate kiddie table.
* Applebees: Our food is arresting.

PUPPY AT ADOPTION EVENT HAD RABIES

Did you attend the Moms and Mutts Rescue Event for Pregnant and Nursing Dogs in Englewood, Colorado, back on July 20? Well, bless your heart for doing such a good thing. Also, you probably have rabies. After the dog adoption event, it was discovered that one of the dogs tested positive for rabies. Rabies can spread if a dog licks or scratches a human or other animal, so people who interacted with the puppy may need a series of shots to prevent infection. The infected puppy was euthanized.
* So, happy ending all around!
* Thanks for coming! See you next year!
* I’m not an expert, but I think the problem might have been in their policy of testing the dogs AFTER the event.
* Maybe next time do the Rescue Event on Zoom?
* And if you don’t have rabies, you might at least want to get yourself dewormed.

MOLASSES TRUCK COLLIDES WITH MANURE TRUCK

Two trucks collided last Friday on Interstate 84, east of Jerome, Idaho. One truck was hauling molasses and the other was hauling manure. The molasses truck plowed into the rear end of the manure truck, which came to rest in the center median and caught fire. About 1,000 pounds of molasses was spilled onto the highway. One passenger in the manure truck was hospitalizes with injuries.
* Ugh. Sweet ‘n’ sour.
* Collision of the year.
* When I first read this story, I thought it was a load of crap.
* An entire truckload of burning manure, and no marshmallows.
* Who was driving the molasses truck, Biff Tannen?
* Where’d the manure come from? Mole-asses? (Sorry about that one.)

AUDIO: PILOT MID-FLIGHT: “I’M NOT QUALIFIED TO LAND THIS PLANE”

Passengers on board Alaska Airlines flight 3492 last Thursday had an unexpected diversion. The flight departed from San Francisco bound for Jackson Hole, Wyoming, but as they were getting close to landing, the passengers heard this from the captain: “Hey, I’m really sorry folks but due to me not having the proper qualification to land in Jackson Hole, we need to divert to Salt Lake City, Utah. We’ll keep you posted on the next steps.” The flight was rerouted to Salt Lake City, and sat on the tarmac for 90 minutes while an appropriate pilot was found. The replacement pilot successfully landed the aircraft in Jackson Hole, but passengers described the landing as one of the bumpiest they had ever experienced, due to a lot of wind. The airline later said that if the weather had been fine at the time of arrival, the original pilot would have been able to land at Jackson Hole as intended.
* They mean ‘badly’?
* That’s the second worst thing you can hear on a plane. The worst is: “I believe my baby and I have this seat next to you.”
* So at Alaska Airlines, the policy for picking pilots for difficult flights is “Let’s see how it goes.”
* Did he miss “wind day” at flight school?
CLIP: Was the pilot Indiana Jones? (Indy: “Fly, yes, land, no.”)
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)com/prep/wp-content/uploads/IndianaJones-FlyYesLandNo(dot)mp3

MASSIVE YARD SIGN THIEF FOUND

Police in the pleasant vacation town of Alexandria, Minnesota, have caught a suspected yard sign thief. Officials located a woman with more than 240 missing signs, from real estate markers to political campaign signs and those advertising special summer events. Police Chief Scott Kent notes that yard signs can be expensive from $10 for small ones up to $300 or more for larger, custom signs. Added together, the value of these stolen signs easily tops $1,000, enough for felony charges. Chief Kent believes the suspect has a motive but says it is “premature” to discuss his suspicions.
* Could he at least give us a sign?
* Competing yard sign manufacturer? Or maybe just a cardboard fetish.
* Even pleasant vacation towns have a dark criminal element.
* Have to admit, getting rid of all the signs made it even pleasanter.
* One of the signs said “Please do not steal this sign.”
* They start with yard signs, then it usually escalates to vinyl banners and those blower air dancer things.

MOTORIZED PANTS

Like climbing mountains, but hate all that effort? Now there are motorized pants that can get you runnin’ up that hill with no problem. New from Arc’teryx are MO/GO pants — short for mountain goat. A lightweight electric motor on the knee ties in to carbon fiber knee braces hidden under the fabric. The pants can boost a hiker’s legs when walking uphill and absorb step impact on the way down. They automatically adjust the amount of assistance based on real-time monitoring of leg movements. The batteries are rechargeable and last three hours. The pants weigh 7 pounds, but the company says they can make a wearer feel up to 30 pounds lighter. MO/GOs will be available in late 2025 and are expected to retail for around $5,000.
* For five grand, I want my mountain climbing pants to have a built-in parachute. Parachute pants!
* Sorry, $5,000 for climbing pants is too steep for me. STEEP!!!
* Can I get motorized pajama pants and program them to take me to the bathroom in the middle of the night so I don’t have to wake up?
* If you’re wearing motorized pants and you fart, can you just say you’re rolling coal?

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

BEAUTY CONTESTANT COMES IN FOURTH, HER DAD SHOOTS AT JUDGE

A regional beauty pageant in Altamira, Brazil, ended in tragedy after the father of one of the contestants started shooting at the judges because his daughter had only gotten fourth place. It happened back on July 28 at the “II Baile da Escolha da Rainha,” or “The Queen’s Choice Ball,” which is a kind of ‘Queen of the Rodeo’ pageant. The gals wear spangled cowboy hats and sexy western wear. After the contest, the father of one of the participants, a local rancher, complained about his daughter’s fourth-place finish and questioned the judges’ evaluation criteria. The father took out a gun and started shooting at one of the judges, only to be shot himself by security. He was taken to a hospital, where he died.
* Well, if it isn’t Mr. Congeniality.
* Usually, angry parents just shoot their mouths off.
* When he opened fire it ruined the whole shootin’ match.
* Wasn’t this the plot on one of those telenovas? La Casa De Papel, or Papá Corazón?
* Apparently he had the killer looks in the family.

TRENDING

WEEKEND BOX OFFICE (August 9-11)

1. Deadpool & Wolverine – $55.8 million
2. It Ends With Us – $49 million
3. Twisters – $15.4 million
4. Borderlands – $10 million
5. Despicable Me 4 – $8.7 million

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

Sept. 2, Monday – Labor Day
Sept. 11, Wednesday – Patriot Day
Sept. 20, Friday – National POW/MIA Recognition Day (The third Friday of September)
Sept. 23, Sunday – Fall begins (Autumn Equinox is 8:44 a.m. EDT)
Oct. 14, Monday – Columbus Day
Oct. 16, Wednesday – National Boss’s Day
Oct. 31, Thursday – Halloween

BIRTHDAYS

Casey Affleck (actor, director, screenwriter, producer, Ben’s brother, “Manchester by the Sea,” “Interstellar”) … 49
Jim Beaver (actor, “Supernatural”) … 74
Mark Knopfler (rock musician and singer with Dire Straits) … 75

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“Does celebrity interest anyone? It’s definitely not appealing to me. I think anyone who’s had any real exposure to it would probably regret ever having even entertained the idea.”

(A) Kim Kardashian
(B) Snoop Dogg
(C) Casey Affleck

ANSWER: (C) Casey Affleck

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

1964 – Mickey Mantle set a major league baseball record when he hit home runs from both the left and ride sides of the plate in the same game.
* What a hot dog.

1898 – Hawaii was annexed by the U.S.
* It was one of our prettier land grabs.

1877 – Thomas Edison invented the phonograph and made the first sound recording.
* He spoke into the amplifying horn and chanted, “I am so smart! I am so smart! I am so smart …”

1865 – Disinfectant was used for the first time during surgery by Joseph Lister.
* “Listerine” mouthwash came later when the nurses asked him if disinfectant would help his horrible breath.

1856 – Anthony Fass patented the accordion.
* A torture device that should long ago have been banned by the Geneva Convention.

1851 – Isaac Singer received a patent for the sewing machine.
* He almost single-handedly revolutionized sweatshops!

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2015 – A second postage stamp was issued in the U.S. bearing the image of Elvis Presley (the first was introduced in 1993). This one featured a black and white photograph by William Speer of Elvis in 1955 and was part of the Music Icon series that began in 2013.

2012 – The London 2012 Olympics ended with a spectacular musical closing ceremony. The three-hour show featured some of the biggest names of British music from decades past, including the Spice Girls, George Michael, The Who, Take That, Muse, Jessie J, Emeli Sande, Elbow, Madness, The Pet Shop Boys, One Direction, Ray Davies, Liam Gallagher, and Brian May and Roger Taylor from Queen.

1984 – As The Olympic Games came to a close, Lionel Richie performed “All Night Long” live from Los Angeles.

1977 – Henri Padovani, guitarist with The Police, quit the group after nine months, leaving them a trio.

1968 – Led Zeppelin’s Jimmy Page, Robert Plant, John Paul Jones and John Bonham played together for the first time when they rehearsed at a studio in London. The first song they played was a version of “Train Kept A-Rollin.”

1967 – Fleetwood Mac played their first concert.

1966 – At a news conference in Chicago, John Lennon publicly apologized for his “Beatles are more popular than Jesus” statement.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. A survey by Forbes revealed that 20% of people do THIS at work at least twice a week, and no one ever knows about it. What is it?
They arrive late

2. Researchers say having THIS at work could increase your happiness as much as earning $100,000 more a year. What is it?
A work BFF

3. Studies show that THIS once-common minor workplace injury is now very rare. What is it?
Paper cuts

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