IDIOT SPRAY PAINTS WEDDING PROPOSAL ON MALL WALL

Kyle Stump, 23, thought he was being romantic when he spray painted: “Michelle Marry Me. I Love You” in huge red letters on the side of a mall in Lake Sheffield, Ohio. Unfortunately, love-of-his-life Michelle Astorino, 21, failed to notice the proposal until Stump took her to the building one night with a flashlight to point it out to her. She said “yes”. Unfortunately, the police said no. Investigators tracked Stump based on a tip and busted him for a graffiti charge of criminal mischief earlier this week. He will have to pay a $200 fine, along with $332 to sandblast his proposal off the brick wall, and will have to perform 80 hours of community service.
* Ever heard the expression “dumb as a stump”? Kyle Stump is that Stump.
* I’m stumped why she would want to marry him.
* He sounds like a real catch.
* Too bad it was the police who caught him.
* “Michelle Marry Me.” Sounds kind of bossy, no?
* Did he at least also smear a box of chocolates on the brick wall?
* Wait, she said “Yes”? So he’s not the only dumb-ass in the story then.
* What’s he going to do about his wedding vows? Spray paint them on the side of the church?
* Someday they’ll look back on this … and feel really stupid.