HOW TO TELL A MOVIE IS GOING TO SUCK

Reddit asked, “What’s the first sign that a movie is going to suck?” Some of the responses:
– “Someone says, ‘I don’t do that anymore. I’m retired.'”
– “Whole movie is shown in the trailer.”
– “From the producers of…”
– “Marketing campaign says, ‘THEY don’t want you to see this movie!’”
– “14 production company logos at the start of the film.”
– “10 minutes in and the screen is still too dark.” (* That’s because THEY literally don’t want you to see this movie!)
– “See how much exposition they have to shove in the trailers.”
– “You see an article titled, ‘Everything you need to know before seeing ‘Black Widow.'”
– “If a cat is in danger.”
– “When reviews use the word ‘de-aged.'”
– “When there’s a sex scene in the first five minutes of the movie.”
– “Side character is pregnant. You pretty much know she’s going to give birth at the worst time.”
– “When it starts in middle of the action and then cuts to ‘3 weeks earlier.'”
– “When the trailer announcer starts with ‘THIS SUMMER…'”
– “It’s a Disney Live Action remake.”
– “It has Adam Sandler grinning like a freshly lobotomized lab monkey on the poster.”
* PHONE TOPIC: How do you know a movie is going to be bad?