GUYS ARE IDIOTS: MISSED SIGNALS

Reddit recently asked, “What’s the biggest hint you’ve ever missed from a woman?” Some of the responses:
– “In high school, I caught a beautiful classmate sitting at my desk. When she looked up and saw me, she turned bright red and looked extremely embarrassed. Hours later, I realized that someone had written a love note directly on the cover of my notebook… And all I thought was, ‘Huh, that’s weird.'”
– “She said, ‘You know I’m single right?’ I said, ‘Yeah, me too.'”
– “Long story short, on a road trip I found myself next to a girl in a bed in a hotel room. I reached out for a bottle of water that was on a table across from her and accidentally brushed her bra strap with my elbow. I apologized and took a gulp of water. She asked ‘Is my bra in the way?’ I said, ‘Nah, I managed to get the bottle, don’t worry about it!’ One day after the road trip ended, it hit me.”
– “Watching TV in my living room at roughly 2 a.m., in the dark. Her: *applying strawberry lip gloss* Me: Why are you putting on lip gloss? Her: Strawberry lip gloss tastes so nice. Want to taste? Me: Nah, I already know what it tastes like.”
– “I had a girl at college ask if I was single. When I said yes, she asked if I was looking for a girlfriend and I said yeah I suppose so. She says, ‘It would be nice to just have someone to go on dates with.’ I, in all my skills with the ladies, came back with ‘yup, sure would be!’ And walked into class.”
– “In high school as I’m coming out of class my long-time crush stops me and says that she heard that I’m some kind of math genius and asked me to tutor her. I asked her what she’s going to pay me. She says very suggestively, ‘Oh don’t worry, you’ll be well rewarded.’ I say, ‘No I need actual numbers to know if it’s worth my time.’ What an idiot.”
– “We were seeing a movie together and she said she was cold. I said, ‘Yeah it’s pretty chilly,’ and did nothing. Later she said it again, pretty obvious what she wanted. I proceeded to give her my jacket to put around her.”
– “My first weekend of college a girl asked me if I wanted to wrestle her in my dorm. I wrestled her in my dorm. Nothing more.”
– “In high school I asked a girl to come watch a movie rental with me and some friends. She was sitting on the floor in front of me, and rubbed her neck saying that her neck/shoulders were sore. Completely missing the cue to offer a back massage, I got up and offered her a Tylenol.”
* PHONE TOPIC: Men or women – do you have a missed signals story?