GERMAN MAN LEFT TIED UP IN WOODS DURING SEX GAME

German police say a 51-year-old man was found tied up in the woods after a cyclist and a hunter heard his screams for help. The man was discovered fully dressed but firmly bound with ropes and a pantyhose over his head sitting on a deer-hunting platform near the town of Bueckburg late Wednesday. Police said the man had been tied up by a woman he met online. After she had done so, the woman received a phone call and fled the woods suddenly, leaving the tied-up man behind in the deer blind. The man said he had “a box cutter on him for such situations” but seemed to have underestimated the woman’s bondage skills because he was unable to reach the knife.
* I’m confused. He could scream for help but didn’t say his safe word?
* This story could’ve gone a whole different way with the addition of a hungry bear.
* Meanwhile, the cyclist and the hunter were like, “What’s it worth to ya for us to untie you?”
* “I mean, we could just put this on TikTok and walk away …”
* The pantyhosen clashed with his lederhosen.