FRIDAY, Aug 16 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR FRIDAY, August 16, 2024
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

NATIONAL AIRBORNE DAY
The National Day Calendar website says this:
“National Airborne Day is observed each year on August 16. This is a day designated by the United States Congress to honor the airborne parts of the nation’s armed forces. August 16, 1940, marks the date of the first official Army parachute jump, validating the innovative concept of inserting United State ground combat forces behind a battle line by parachute.”

NATIONAL ROLLER COASTER DAY

NATIONAL RUM DAY

NATIONAL TELL A JOKE DAY

August is:

Black Business Month
Family Fun Month
International Peace Month
National Back to School Month
National Catfish Month
National Crayon Collection Month
National Goat Cheese Month
National Golf Month
National Panini Month
National Peach Month
National Sandwich Month

THE BUZZIT WAS JUST A PHASE

Reddit asked. “What was something you really got into but now ‘it was a just phase’?” Some of the responses:
– “I went through a phase of learning to juggle.”
– “Tried to be a master chef with elaborate recipes. Now, the microwave is my best friend.”
– “I wore a cowboy hat for a year.”
– “Knitting. Knitted the heck out of a scarf, turned into a dog blanket.”
– “Dubstep. I had to purge all my playlist of 100s of hours of music that sounded like putting cartoon animals in a blender.”
– “My skateboarding phase from 12-14. I wore all the clothes, had the look, and could barely do a kickflip.
– ” I really got into sailing. Signed up at the local college and learned to sail. Did some competitive racing. I even built a wooden sailboat. After a number of years and getting caught in some bad storms, getting all rigged up just in time for the wind to die, I realized this sport is anything but peaceful and relaxing. Now I sit on the beach and watch the sailboats go by and think…. Poor saps… They could be lying on the beach relaxing.”
– “I used to drive for hours to watch ospreys. I’d book a hotel for 2 nights and spend hours watching them. Then, I didn’t. ”
– “In the late 80s I had my hair into a mullet before it was even called the mullet. Was cool at the time but along came Mr. Achey Breaky Heart, and then Joe Dirt to put the nail in the coffin.”
– “Yoga can get pretty culty. I was going to lessons where they started pushing me to go every weekend, every day, go to seminars… and it became very pushy and weird… I just wanted to do yoga once a week, eventually I stopped going because it was too uncomfortable.”
* PHONE TOPIC: What weird phase did you go through? Are you still going through it?

U.S. NEWS

WOMAN HITS BOYFRIEND WITH CAR ON THE WAY TO COUPLES THERAPY

Last Saturday, in Fergus Falls, Minnesota, Veronica Gast was driving to couples therapy with her boyfriend. They had been arguing for most of the day, and kept arguing on the ride over. At some point, her boyfriend told her he thought they should just break up and asked her to take him home. Instead, she stopped the car and ordered him out. As the boyfriend later told police, he was walking in front of the car to the sidewalk when Gast made eye contact with him and “floored” it, hitting him with her car. He was thrown onto the hood and shattered the windshield. Gast admitted to hitting her boyfriend with her car but claimed the windshield only cracked because he punched it after she hit him. She was arrested and is facing a second-degree assault charge.
* What’s ironic is, the argument was over him never taking her anywhere. Now she’s going somewhere.
* Unlike her car, the therapy wasn’t making an impact.
* I hope she used her one phone call to stop payment on the check to her couples therapist.
* There goes the testimonial for the therapist’s website.
* Couples have problems should never hit each other. Especially with their cars.

MOM SPENDS NIGHT WITH DAUGHTER FIRST NIGHT OF COLLEGE

A woman in North Carolina is getting mixed reactions after she posted that she had spent the night in her daughter’s dorm room on the daughter’s first night away at college. Lori Miggins, 48, dropped her daughter Taylor off at Appalachian State University last week. The girl was there a couple of days early for cheerleading camp, so the extra bunk bed was available. Mom decided to stay the night. She added that she sought permission from both the college and Taylor’s future roommate. She posted on Instagram, “Very lucky to have had the chance to spend the first night in my daughter’s college dorm room with her.” When people started commenting that it was kinda creepy, Miggins wrote, “We made a memory that will last a lifetime! That’s all. You do you, and I’ll do me! No need to be so negative!”
* It’s Appalachian State. I’m sure all sorts of relatives stay the night all the time.
* On the other hand, with the price of college these days, why not use it as a hotel when you can?
* Then the mom spent the next day practicing with her daughter at cheerleading camp.
* And applied to join a sorority.
* PHONE TOPIC: Is this a normal motherly thing to do?

CHIEFS PLAYER WANTS TO BUY CHICKEN WING THIEF OUT OF JAIL

Here’s a strange story with a stranger turn of events. A 68-year-old woman named Vera Liddell had worked for years for a school district near Chicago. One of her responsibilities was ordering food for the school district. Between July 2020 and February 2022, Liddell had been ordering massive amounts of chicken wings. But the wings never made it to the school cafeteria, nor to the kids who were supposed to receive meals at home during the pandemic. By the time officials caught on, she had ordered and then disappeared 11,000 cases of chicken wings. [For some reason, it has remained unclear what happened to the missing chicken wings.] Her attorneys have said that Liddell could not pay restitution because she had a gambling problem. Last week, on August 9, Liddell pleaded guilty and was sentenced to nine years in prison.
– And now, the twist: Kansas City Chiefs defensive tackle Chris Jones has stepped up to cover the $1.5 million worth of stolen chicken wings in exchange for the woman’s release from prison. In a social media post Tuesday, Jones said, “I’ll pay for the wings that she stole to get her free.” He did not offer an explanation as to why he made the offer. He just offered to pay money to set her free.
* Sounds like someone’s planning an awesome tailgate party for opening day.
* Since Chris Jones made his offer, everybody getting arrested in the United States is using their one phone call to call him.
* I’m not sure this is how the U.S. legal system works, but ok.
* Wait – what am I thinking? Money will keep you out of prison. That’s EXACTLY how the U.S. legal system works.
* Let’s play a song – I need to call Uber Eats.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

NORTH KOREA OPEN FOR TOURISM

North Korea has announced that they will resume international tourism this winter, ending a COVID-era ban on travelers. Foreign tourists will be permitted to visit the North Korean city of Samjiyon. North Korea has been working for years to develop and build tourism facilities in Samjiyon, a mountain city near the Chinese border. Other areas of the country could potentially-also-possibly-maybe-might become accessible too, they say. Another major tourism site is being constructed on the country’s eastern coast.
* It’s certainly cheaper than Disney World, and probably less repressive.
* Be sure to have your passport, your toiletries in a clear plastic bag, and a list of your preferred methods of torture.
* “Foreign tourists will be permitted to visit the North Korean city of Samjiyon.” Whether they will be permitted to LEAVE is a little more iffy.
* There’s so much to see in North Korea!
– The Ministry of Ruthlessness.
– The place where many North Koreans get their food, also known as the Sod Farm.
– The hole in the ocean where all the test missiles go.
– The new restaurant, International House of Hostages.
– And of course, the Kim Jong Un Memorial Everything.

TRENDING

IKE BARINHOLTZ WINS JEOPARDY AND WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE

Comedian/Actor/Writer Ike Barinholtz is the king of celebrity game shows. Last year he won “Celebrity Jeopardy” and even made it onto the “Tournament of Champions.” And now, he’s won “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire.” Ike and his dad, Alan, became the first pair to win the $1,000,000 grand prize on the celebrity version of the long-running game show. The money is going to a charity, ASL Program at Los Encinos School. Their final question leading to the million dollars: “Not including blanks or bonus spaces, the highest-valued three-letter Scrabble word is ‘zax,’ which is a what?” They guessed option D: “Tool for cutting roofing slates.” And that was the correct answer.

MATTHEW PERRY DEATH ARRESTS

Multiple arrests have been made in connection with actor Matthew Perry’s death. U.S. Attorney Martin Estrada announced at a Thursday morning news conference that charges have been brought against two doctors, Perry’s live-in assistant and someone known as “the Ketamine Queen,” who allegedly helped supply him with ketamine before his death. A criminal investigation was launched after the Los Angeles County medical examiner’s office determined Perry died due to “acute effects of ketamine.” The Friends star was found dead in his pool on Oct. 28, 2023. Anne Milgram, DEA administrator, said at Thursday’s press conference the actor became addicted to “intravenous ketamine” when he sought treatment for anxiety and depression. The doctors refused to increase his dosage so he went elsewhere. “As Matthew Perry’s ketamine addiction grew, he wanted it more and he wanted it faster and cheaper. That is how he ended up buying from street dealers who sold the ketamine that ultimately led to his death,” she said.

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

Sept. 2, Monday – Labor Day
Sept. 11, Wednesday – Patriot Day
Sept. 20, Friday – National POW/MIA Recognition Day (The third Friday of September)
Sept. 23, Sunday – Fall begins (Autumn Equinox is 8:44 a.m. EDT)
Oct. 14, Monday – Columbus Day
Oct. 16, Wednesday – National Boss’s Day
Oct. 31, Thursday – Halloween

BIRTHDAYS

Dan Smyers (country singer w Dan and Shay) … 37
Ashton Shepherd (country singer) … 38
Emily Robison (country vocalist with The Chicks) … 52
Steve Carell (actor) … 62
Timothy Hutton (actor) … 64
Madonna (pop legend, born Madonna Ciccone) … 66
Angela Bassett (actress, “American Horror Story”) … 66
Laura Innes (actress, “How to Get Away with Murder,” “ER”) … 67
James Cameron (director) … 70
Kathie Lee (Gifford) (TV personality) … 71
Julie Newmar (actress, played “Catwoman” on the 60s Batman TV show) … 91

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“I won’t be happy till I’m as famous as God.”

(A) Elon Musk
(B) Kim Kardashian
(C) Madonna

ANSWER: (C) Madonna

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2021 – U.S. President Joe Biden said “I stand squarely behind my decision” to withdraw US troops from Afghanistan, despite the sudden collapse of the country to the Taliban.
* Mission Not Accomplished.

2008 – Talk show host Ellen DeGeneres and actress Portia de Rossi were married at their Beverly Hills home.
* It’s the perfect match – sneakers and stilletos.

1987 – Thousands of people worldwide began a two-day celebration of the “harmonic convergence,” which believers called the start of a new, purer age of humankind.
* Yeah … it didn’t work.

1954 – Sports Illustrated was published for the first time. It was claimed that 250,000 subscriptions had been sold before the first issue came off of the presses.
* And that’s without any mention of a swimsuit issue.

1898 – Edwin Prescott patented the roller coaster.
* Shortly thereafter, someone thought of the seat belt.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2005 – Madonna suffered three cracked ribs, a broken collarbone and a broken hand in a horse-riding accident on her country estate. The accident happened when she fell off a new horse on her 47th birthday.

2005 – P. Diddy appeared on the Today Show and announced that he was altering his stage name again, dropping the “P.” and referring to himself simply as “Diddy.” The name change to Diddy upset Richard “Diddy” Dearlove, a London-based DJ who took out court proceedings against P. Diddy over the use of the name. He won when an out of court settlement of approximately $180,000 was agreed to. As a result, Combs is no longer able to use the name Diddy in the UK.

1985 – Madonna wed Sean Penn on her 27th birthday.

1977 – Elvis Presley’s fiancée Ginger Alden discovered him unresponsive on the bathroom floor of his Graceland mansion. Attempts to revive him failed, and he was pronounced dead at Baptist Memorial Hospital, age 42.

1975 – Peter Gabriel quit Genesis, elevating drummer Phil Collins to lead vocalist.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. On average, you’ll throw out about $2,000 worth of THIS every year. What is it?
Food

2. Only 3% of the American population has never tried THIS food. What is it?
Jello

3. Only 1% of THIS food sold in the U.S. will actually be eaten. What is it?
Pumpkins – 99% are used for decoration only

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