DRUNK MAN RIDES A HORSE UP TO 5TH FLOOR APARTMENT TO IMPRESS WIFE

Police in Russia say a drunk man rode a white horse into an apartment building at 3 a.m. and presented it to his wife to make up with her after a fight. 33-year-old Sergei Antipov said he took the horse from a farm where he used to work, hoping to show up as “Prince Charming” and make up with his wife. At one point, the man tried to fit the horse into the elevator to get up to his fifth-floor apartment. The horse didn’t fit so he rode it up the stairs to their tiny apartment instead. Secuity footage of the incident showed the horse and a large pile of manure in the building’s entranceway as the man tried to mount it. The horse is now back at the farm.
* Now there’s just one horse’s ass at the apartment.
* A large pile of manure? Sounds like the horse had the trots.
* (in a low horsey voice) Hello. I’m Comrade Ed.
* I hope his wife said, “Screw you, and the horse you rode in on.”
* At least he tried. I mean, doesn’t every girl want a pony?