CRIMINAL KEPT ESCAPING BY DEFECATING IN HIS PANTS UPON DETAINMENT

In Delhi, India, police have finally caught an infamous criminal, a 27-year-old thief and pickpocket who continually evaded arrest by defecating in his pants to keep the police off him. The thief evaded arrest multiple times by deploying his strategy of defecating in his pants to create a stench so unbearable that officers hesitated to apprehend him. This past Monday, a patrol team spotted him behaving suspiciously. As soon as he saw the police, he attempted to flee. They gave chase and pinned him down. As expected, he deployed what they called his infamous ’filth plan’ but the officers, equipped with gloves and masks, thwarted his efforts and took him in custody.
* He must steal to support his laundry habit.
* And, yes, he was ratted out by a stool pigeon.
* “Your honor, the prosecution would like to enter Exhibits S, H, I and T.”
* “In my client’s defense, your honor, let it be noted that he eats Indian food.”
* They got him under the statute of habeas crapus.
* Give those officers a brown star.