MAN PUNCHES SELF IN FACE TO AVOID BREATHALYZER
They still arrested him.
AUDIO: PRINCIPAL ANNOUNCES SNOW DAY WITH COUNTRY SONG PARODIES
I Got Friends In Snow Places.
MAN AVENGES DECADE-OLD FART PRANK
By setting fire to parents’ house.
BURGER KING EMPLOYEE PULLS GUN, DEMANDS TO WORK MORE
He wanted more hours. Is that so wrong?
JAYWALKER HIT BY TRUCK, GIVEN A TICKET
Just not his day.
MANHOLE COVERS STOLEN
And recovered.
PLASTIC SURGEON SHOWS UP DRUNK FOR SURGERY
Plastered surgeon, more like.
WALMART KICKED PEOPLE OUT OF THE STORE DURING HAWAIIAN MISSILE SCARE
You learn who your friends are during a missile scare.